He’ll Huff And He’ll Puff

at

belfort

Care to see The Wolf?

Controversial capitalist Jordan Belfort, aka ‘The Wolf of Wall Street’, is coming to the RDS, Dublin with CollegeTimes.com, TOMORROW Tuesday (May 27), with a sales and entrepreneurship seminar ‘The Truth Behind The Success Of The Real Life Wolf of Wall Street’.

Tickets are on sale from ticketmaster.ie here at a wolfish €80.

We Have TWO pairs of tickets to giveaway.

To enter, please complete this simple sentence.

“I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because___________________________”

Lines MUST Close at 3.15pm 4.15pm.

UPDATE: winner: ” I’ve been aurally savaged by political wolves for this past month so hearing a from a genuine wolf would be a welcome change.” (Fergal Duffy)

Previously: There May be Qualuudes

Thanks Aislinn

46 thoughts on “He’ll Huff And He’ll Puff

  1. Spaghetti Hoop

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because I’m a struggling, ambitious actor named Leo and I never win anything.

  2. Norm

    I’ve just received a delivery of a shed load of pens from ailbaba.com and I need to find somewhere to try and flog them.

  3. John

    “I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because this may be closest I will get to Margot Robbie in a round-a-bout way”

  4. Bertie Blenkinsop

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because Kanye and Kim are moping around my gaff and I need to get out of the house for the evening.

  5. wearnicehats

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because I want to see howl he goes about things.

    Is my coat around here somewhere?

  6. Ahjayzis

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because my eye-poking-out apparatus is in the shop and thus have no better option.

  7. Mr T

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because it’s about time I shed this sheeps clothing…

  8. chequenrays

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because I’ve discovered a stage beyond Cerebral Palsy that I deen ot llet mih tuoba

  9. Rob

    Unlike the movie Belfart ratted out everyone he knew the first sniff of the FBI. He still hasn’t paid the people he ripped off back. He’ll fit right in with Ireland’s financial community so.

  10. Slugger

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because my cousin-wife and I haven’t had a night out in ages.

  11. Johnny Cos

    I demand to see the Wolf of Wall Street because I think of myself as a one-man Wolf Pack. Jordan is a Wolf and once I saw the WOWS I knew he was one of my own. And my Wolf Pack…it grew by one. So there… there are two of us in the wolf pack… I was alone first in the pack, and then Jordan joined in later. Two of us wolves, running around Ballsbridge, in Dublin, looking for strippers and Quaaludes.

  12. Jay

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because, well, frankly, you all bore the fupp out of me.

  13. pooter

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because I need to count the 569 fupps to make sure they didnt fupp up

  14. SOMK

    I demand to see the wolf of Wall Street because, well firstly he isn’t a real wolf is he? Wolves aren’t all bad, after all, we bred dogs from them after all and I’ve known some lovely dogs in my time, and this grinning piss streak man is anything but lovely. Look at his smug face, this is a guy who shamelessly made his fortune by blatantly lying to thousands upon thousands of vulnerable, stupid and naïve fellow citizens and got clean away with it. He is the very epitome of everything that is rotten at the soul of modern America and in indeed the world, he is scum, only scum actually has some use, it acts as a first level of defence against disease, where Jordan Belfort is a tapeworm in a suit. If there was any justice in the world when he went down for what he did (which was make an absolute fortune by not just cheating and lying to thousands upon thousands of people, but encouraging thousands of other to do it too, and he’s still doing it with his vile seminars of which the ticket prize is an example of), he would not only still be in prison, but he would be in the deepest darkest hole, positioned in the sewer of the world’s busiest emergency diarrhoea and ass parasite evacuation clinic, in the world poorest country (hence they can only afford a single toilet bowl) with his mouth and eyes wired open and position under their single toilet facing upwards, every day he would be shat on until the point at which he enters cardiac arrest from suffocation, upon which time he would be jolted back into his wretched life with the cheapest second hand aldi defibrillator money can rent, have his stomach pumped of faeces and urine, kicked repeatedly in the face and groin and then quick as a flash repositioned so that his terrible existence could continue, there would also be an answering machine set up next to him where the victims of his fraud could phone him up 24/7 and tell him exactly what they think of him and what they’d like to do to him when he gets out (all his victims would be made aware of the precise time and location of his release and would be given a significant pot of cash so that they could fund their more imaginative revenge projects should they wish). Of course because he was white, rich, and (unlike Madoff) he committed a white collar crime that didn’t defraud anyone powerful enough worth a damn, he got off with a soft sentence despite the billions in misery he’d inflicted on others, he is long since free, and even had a Hollywood film made out of him, which every single twat who’s forked out €80 to go see this soulless (just look at those empty, empty eyes) excuse of a life form, more than likely saw and either completely misunderstood the point of, or just didn’t care. If you give me the tickets, I will personally wipe my ass with them (if you want proof, I’ll happily supply it, in whatever format you wish) and there’ll be two less gobs*ites trained in his thieving ways in Ireland, which I think , all things being considered (especially given our history with the banks Ahern, etc.), would probably be for the best.

      1. SOMK

        *WHEREAS Jordan McDICKFACE is a tapeworm in a suit, oh dear so many spelling errors.

    1. Medium Sized C

      Woah dude.
      Just woah.

      Also, his book was really badly written.
      I couldn’t even finish it.

  15. budgie

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because i read the book before the movie was cool.

  16. Maria

    I demand to see The Wolf Of Wall Street because the first lesson of success is to not spend €80 on tickets to a success semianr

  17. Cormac

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because I’ve seen the wolves in the zoo loads of times and this one might be a little different. (I’d still get icecream and take pictures, although they probably wont have a shop for me to buy you a cuddly toy souvenir.)

  18. Aisling Twomey

    I demand to see the Wolf of Wall Street because I want to learn how to tell con stories, while conning people out of 80 quid each.

  19. Fergal Duffy

    I’ve been aurally savaged by political wolves for this past month so hearing a from a genuine wolf would be a welcome change.

  20. T Bone

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because there are two kinds of people: sheep and sharks. I’m a shark. Sharks are winners, and they don’t look back because they have no necks. Necks are for sheep

  21. Ian M

    I demand to see The Wolf of Wall Street because I’m hoping to find my granny.

    Yours,

    L. R. Ridinghood

  22. moochaill

    I demand to see the Wolf of Wall Street because I want to wait until he walks out on stage, shout “You’re not Gordon Gekko” and leave. But it’s not worth €80 of my own money to do it.

  23. kang

    I demand to see the wolf of wall street because I wanna hear the seminar before I see the movie.

  24. Fine Gruel

    Not really interested in listening to a selfish jumped up car salesman egomaniac who got rich by being a cheat and a liar.

    Would we all be gooing over some other criminal who made millions by breaking the law and treating people like sh*t?

  25. Vinny

    I demand to see the wolf of Wall Street because I am at a loose end tomorrow and don’t have €80.

    Unexciting yet true, BS.

  26. KW

    I demand to see the Wolf of Wall Street because I’ve got ludes, the last ones on the planet. You can tell the shortarse that from me.

  27. Mourinho

    I demand to see the Wolf of Wall Street because I want to send the brother. He’ll probably win the E&Y Entrepreneur of the Year some year but he’s too nice. Needs a bit of crookedness in him.

        1. Mikeyfex

          That suits me considering you actually want to go to this, and need to win a ticket to get there. Enjoy.

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