Frilly’s Facts Of Online Life

at

Chompsky

‘sup?

What’s the best thing about this site?

Leather Jacket Guy.

it’s YOU, you big lummox.

Frilly Keane writes:

Years ago, like before I even made the Confir, I was at the Merries in Tramore, and there was this bathroom cabinet type box hammered into the side of a wall that read “want to see what a litter bug looks like?” Or sum’ting like that. There was a mirror inside.

What seems like an ancient so what, it somehow pins itself onto some of the replies around here lately. The “that’s me done with Broadsheet” and the “another waste of 60 seconds of my life” etcetera etcetera’s.

Since ye already know who ye are here’s sum’ting to chew and spit on; the next time ye’re in front of the mirror plucking nose hairs or the bristles off yer chin, take a closer look. Who is actually responsible for the content presented on Broadsheet?

In fairness to the Broadsheet format, it is different to the other gaffs I’ve been known on over the years. They manage the threads with their own bare hands, which might make them a bit too choosy.

There is no edit button, no polls, and there are no PMs for lads to take their sh1te off the frontline threads, and there are no Members. Their edit policies are bit prudish, and as for the poo fupp Santy’s Naughty list, I share yere indignation.

Anyone who would have been familiar with the first ever GAA Discussion Page would agree that it was so mad that even the address didn’t make sense. Yes, it was Stone-Age but it was laugh out loud all day long, 9-5 Monday to Friday, yet it wouldn’t have lasted a week in this era.

There wasn’t a lad there who wouldn’t have ended up getting a Solicitor’s Letter. As more pages and forums developed, and usually grown out of a fall out with another site admin, we too as Blog’ards grew up a bit and had to observe T & Cs and User protocols; we’d get banned, we’d give ourselves a makeover and get back in, finish off the fight and shake it up all over again.

Admittedly there were times too during the first leg of Clarehurlers.com, although rare when in context with the traffic and the maturity stage of our t’internetting, when meself and Matt had to interfere.

Yet, through all these stages of online banter evolution the admins, the anorakers, the copy and posters, the contributors, the users, the messers, the phishers, the multiples, the hackers, the boggers bloggers and general nutters, ARE THE CONTENT.

Take on the responsibility yourselves lads. Submit your own threads. Someone called for an Open Mike on my last string, yet you already have one. If you can’t go beyond supplying the odd How Much or Sur’ Where Would Ya Get It or Was it for this, and even if Bodger ignored your toenail clipping in the shape of Co Roscommon, then at least accept the fact that it’s not your Host that is falling short.

Don’t be looking around and finding fault like stuck up bitches. Let’s have yere Laugh Out Louds. There are plenty of replies flocking in after my Frill-Bits. But there’s Sweet FA that would have ya laughing till the tay came out yer nostrils. (Although, truth be told n’all that, being called pretentious triggered a fairly daycent snort at this end.)

The best example I can give of Users slash Members being the oxygen to sites like Broadsheet does go back so roll yere eyes; but there still might be those lurkers who will remember The Kennys from my Clarehurler.com days. Or The Mairegangaire Guide to GAA Men and its other half Paddy Mac’s Bluffers Guide to GAA Women that was spammed into orbit and back.

Those two threads brought 100s (and that was a lot in the old dial up days) of new users to their respective hosts.

But the Content was then, and still is, user generated. Dial up, ISDN, 4G, Wiffy WhyFi Broadband, Ready-To-Go or someone else’s login. The connection is the same.

From A to Z. (That’s you Offaly ya bollix ya) ABM To Zuppy. Whether its Mick with his crayons or Mani with his one liners, Shannonsider to Leitrim Hurler, MayoForSam or TTown Boy (annuder little bollix) we are all in charge of the supply.

Anudder’ting, and I’m smirking ta’meself here as I write this. Nobody on this forum is forcing you to click on a thread or even reply. Do you really still not know what to expect from a We Don’t Normally Do This? There is a bunch of regular threads I don’t peruse, and there is a particular theme I don’t contribute to. Maybe that’s a practice exercise some of ye might like to try out. Unless you are only in it to complain, or start a ding dong or troll, and so what, because that’s all up to you; not me, not Broadsheet.

Finally, some matters of information I want ye to know. I am not a Journalist, or a Writer, or a Professional Academic and Commentator, nor am I employed by a Third Party or an Organisation that has a special interest.

I am not looking for advancement, election, nor am I eyeing up a better gig. The chair I’m sitting now, the device I’m using to type this, the heater under my arse and the WiFi that runs to this outlet; is all from my own pocket.

I did not ask or canvas Broadsheet, nor did I promote myself with them. In the interests of full disclosure, over the years I have been approached by other media. I have obliged, but very few, usually wireless or web based, and only where I have a personal interest in the topic. I have also been approached with a publishing offer (although t’wasn’t lately.) Broadsheet Execs have given me no direction, a promise of no editing, and a full do what you like.

Last week’s Frill-Bit was not an indulgence or a “pretentious” showboating search for attention. It was not Art either (although I do like the idea, especially if it qualifies for a bitta’ tax exemption.)

I knew it wouldn’t be widely or well received; I did it because it was different and felt I’d left enough time for Alan Rickman’s nearest and dearest have him all to themselves. Neither Broadsheet or any other platform that I am aware of has ever published something like it before.

I wasn’t afraid of that as I am not a follower by nature, either on line or on land. Other than all that it was my favourite so far and I’m delighted I put my name to it.

My biggest disappointment so far in this series is the lack of attention the Credit Union Movement got, if that’s my fault then I will have to work harder on it, and ye, because I won’t be letting that particular victim of the financial apocalypse get so far out of our reach that we can’t get it back for ourselves. Save broadsheet@broadsheet.ie now and fill it with all the openers ye’ve got waiting for us.

And Keep It Country

PS: Ye should see what I’ve got under the Frill-Grill for ye next week.

Frilly Keane’s column appears here every Friday. Follow Frilly on Twitter: @frillykeane

90 thoughts on “Frilly’s Facts Of Online Life

  1. Joni2015

    I miss the old days when forums ruled. You could get up to all sorts with multiple accounts and a constant supply of dim newcomers. I had my username and comments read out once in the high court.

        1. Joni2015

          Not far off. I’ve been playing with fire the past few months and it has taken its toll. She has come back but it’s even more complicated. Getting addicted to painkillers hasn’t helped.

  2. RT

    I was hoping this would be a “I’ve had some time to reflect on the feedback I’ve received and have decided not to pursue this column anymore” but I was disappointed.

    Hope this is the beginning of the end of this drive (though it seems likely it was continue for a few more weeks) I heavily doubt I’ll read another.

  3. Murtles

    “Take on the responsibility yourselves lads. Submit your own threads.”
    I will not……you can’t make me…….ok I will.

    MURTLES 56 WAYS TO TEASE A CAT

  4. Dόn 'The Unstoppable Force' Pídgéόní

    Better than last week at least :)

    I still think the open mic idea is a good one , which is basically what you’re saying anyway, and i think you are right. But we are lazy little mofos so I don’t know

      1. Dόn 'The Unstoppable Force' Pídgéόní

        Thanks Frida!

        You seem nice, we should totes hang out. Skinny mocha chai latter?

  5. Butter

    Stop trying to make Leather Jacket Twit a thing if you want “authentic” posts on here then, is that your idea of the oxygen we should all be breathing?

      1. Anomanomanom

        Stupid answer, it’s replies like that everyone hates seeing. If someone likes BS but doesn’t like a continuous line of posts, “don’t click them” is not constructive feed back.

      2. Gav D

        Pure hypocrisy. Don’t think I’ve ever seen a rugby or star wars thread where you haven’t chimed in on the comments section with a “I don’t like this stop liking what I don’t like” type of comment.

        Your post might – might – have had a point, were it not for how ludicrously self-serving what you’re saying in this post is in context of the (mostly justified) criticism your posts have been getting.

        You could replace the entire post with three words: “I AM BUTTHURT””.

        1. Penelope

          The difference is that Star Wars and Rugby are topics that at least some readers will be interested in but LJG is some random fella making videos which nobody enjoys yet he is posted here more often than anything else.

          1. meadowlark

            I enjoyed reading the increasingly rebellious comments yesterday, particularly the excellent trolling of Bodger.

            Very entertaining, if only for that.

  6. Butter

    Stop trying to make Leather Jacket Guy a thing if you want “authentic” posts on here then, is that your idea of the oxygen we should all be breathing?

  7. Gers

    Another useless post on BS. See that’s what the problem is. A smidgen of good posts and a tons of useless drool, Limericks topping the pile. But what ya gonna do?

    1. Gav D

      Quality is not important. As long as we all open, read and comment on the articles each week (more than 100 comments each time) they’ll allow it to continue.

      I said it last week, but if this drivel is all it takes to get people to engage, even if its only out of irritation, then fair play if it drives traffic. Which is not to say that anyone is wrong to point out that its rubbish.

  8. Starina

    could ye not to a word count limit of 750 though, frilly? i agree with the community sentiment but 1200 words is well into tl;dr territory

    1. Anne

      Stop after every two words, think about their meaning.. then think about the next two words’ meaning and somehow you begin to get the gist of the whole sentence, after a re-read or two.
      That works for me.. Hope that helps.

  9. Anne

    I really wanted to say something nice.. so I’ll just say this – it’s an improvement on last week’s submission.
    Although, in fairness anything would have been an improvement.

    But yeah, we’re all grown up a bit online.
    I’ve come to think of some commenters online as like deranged maniacs sitting on a park bench shouting obscenities at passersby. You don’t sit yourself down on the bench with the maniac and hash things out, so why do it online? You ignore them and scurry past asap if you’ve got your marbles somewhat intact like.

    Don’t really get people having a conniption if stuff is deleted either, or if any toenails that look like Roscommon are ignored. It doesn’t matter like. Move on. Also the poo and fupp editing is kinda funny..

    There’s my contribution to the facts of online life now..

    1. rory

      The maniac on the bench thing is an interesting insight. I find I do have the need to sit with the maniac while I wouldn’t feel the need in real life (at least not with the same sense of desperation to interact/assert.)
      Maybe because i can’t see the maniacs face, and I project a superior entity onto the person, whom I then wrestle with (if a silly argument ensues), to assert my own ‘rightness’, to convince the superior entity (and myself) that I am worthy, that I am on their level, or even beyond it.
      If it was real life I would see the Maniacs face and see that he/she was human.

      1. Anne

        Scurry along online, like you would in real life.
        You don’t need validation of worthiness from the maniacs. :)
        They’re not there for rational debate.. they just need an outlet.. anyone’ll do um.

        1. Serval

          I love the irony of Anne replying to the type of maniac she is encouraging the rest of us to ignore.

          1. Serval

            Yes there’s nothing wrong with what he said.
            There’s nothing wrong with what a lot of maniacs say.
            Yes, I’m a maniac but you should not ignore me.
            I’m a maniac and you’re having an online discussion with me.
            That’s maniacal behaviour on both of your parts.

          2. Serval

            “…some commenters online… (are) like deranged maniacs sitting on a park bench shouting obscenities at passersby. You don’t sit yourself down on the bench with the maniac and hash things out, so why do it online? You ignore them and scurry past asap if you’ve got your marbles somewhat intact like.”

          3. rory

            So you’re saying you’re a maniac and the obscenity you are shouting at me is ‘your marbles must not be intact because you are talking to me.’ Is this what you are saying?

  10. Shayna

    I kinda get it? I read last week’s ‘Grilly Keane’ and I made some absurd comment regarding Alan Rickman and a food order. Frilly, you’re clearly an intelligent woman when you write intelligibly, perhaps less fun when you do – is that your charm? Quite a few years ago I worked on the Royal Variety Show in London, Les Dawson had a Steinway grand piano on stage. During his rehearsals, he played the piano impeccably and entertained all the crew, delighting us with his regales. Come the show, he was a different beast altogether. He knew all the notes, but didn’t necessarily put them in the right order (Eric Morecambe) for effect. Do what you do best!

    1. Frilly Keane

      You worked with Les Dawson!
      He’s one’s my comedy hero’s
      Seriously
      He’s alongside Ronnie Barker for me

      Anyway. I don’t know if you know this already but Les was actually a fully suited and booted concert pianist. And not just that.
      He could ( and regularly did) swap the base clef notes over to his right hand and the treble clef to his left.

  11. rotide

    This sort of read like a Tolkien version of “if you dont like it, dont read it” with a full rendition of all 12 verses of the Elvish ballad “submit more links”.

    The problem is that the vast majority of this site is NOT user generated. The editors decide what submissions are published and most of the time they ensure that submissions fit with the general editorial policy of the site. This isn’t really a massive problem, its the way blogs and indeed a lot of old media works, but you can’t pretend that its user generated.

    That editorial evolves as well. [BLUESHIRT] 3 years ago, there wouldn’t be random photos of enda kenny purely for the purpose of allowing the comments to call him a big spa, and there is no way a submission of Anne Marie or her boss looking like a big stupid head would be published now [/BLUESHIRT]

    If you want to see truly democratic user generated content, then there is a site that does that and it’s name is censored here even if 50% of the non-political posts originate from there. R eddit is the epitome of user driven content even if it’s not to everyones tastes (I prefer BS for an irish vibe than /r/ireland for example) not only that but the users decide what the best stuff is, not the owners of the site. Closer to home boards.ie is purely user driven content also.

    Again, I’m not saying that broadsheet should go down that road and I don’t think it should but don’t pretend that the site’s lifeblood is its user submissions.

    In short,

          1. Frilly Keane

            I wasn’t sneering Roti
            I don’t think I ever even mentioned those two sites, Here or anywhere else that I have ( or had) a login.
            Seriously. But happy to be proved wrong.
            So feel free ta’

            What I can say for sure is I’ve never even opened one of those sites you’re quoting. I stay local. Always have.

            And as for the other, never logged in, never contributed. However, I have followed links to the occassional news item tho, like maybe at once a’ fortnight frequency, at the most tbh.

            BTW. I know Broadsheet isnt like the other forums I’ve been on.

            Christ, I only have to give the PV Death Notices 60 seconds to know that.

          2. rotide

            I know you didn’t mention them, My point was that those sites are solely driven by user generated content. Broadsheet is not and never will be.

          3. sǝɯǝɯʇɐpɐq

            Oh dear Frilly;
            ‘…I’ve never even opened one of those sites you’re quoting. I stay local…’

            What’s this commotion?
            We’ll have no trouble here…
            This is a local site, for local eejits.

  12. Lilly

    Why doesn’t everyone relax and give Frilly a chance to get into her groove. Where’s the fire. You’re here because you enjoy BS, so have some faith in its team.

    1. bertie blenkinsop

      I admire your optimism.
      I am a kindred spirit.
      I even backed Christian Benteke to finish top scorer this season.

  13. Kerri Ann

    Help me out here. The bits of this that are about GAA forums, clarehurler.com and such. Does everyone but me know what that’s about? Does anyone want to try an annotated version? A lot of this is over my head.

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