The Alt-Delete Movement – All You Need To Know

at

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From top: Anti-Trump protest; Dan Boyle

You know about the ‘alt-right’, right?

Now meet the ‘Alt-Delete’.

Dan Boyle writes:

We’re hip, we’re happening, we’re now. We are the fittest, the strongest, the smartest and the wordiest. We are the future. If you want to get with getting us these phrases may help.

All you want to know about the Alt-Delete – A Glossary

Alt Delighted: That feeling of euphoria when given a prestigious platform by the mainstream media to publish the most toxic of views.

Benitos: Being blonde is good but being bald can be better.

Common Cause: Working together with Alt Delete movements in other countries trying to bring an end to international cooperation.

FemiNazis: The delicious irony when we call people we don’t like (and who won’t talk to us) Nazis.

Freedom: We talk about this a lot but none of us believe it.

Golden Retrievers: Minions of Donald Trump.

Legally Blonde: A classic film.

Libtards: Comfortable undergarment. Helps prevent chaffing while goosestepping.

Mushy: The ability to grow facial hair like some of our greatest heroes.

Normies: Fans of the beloved sitcom character ‘Norm’ from the TV series ‘Cheers’.

Oxymorons: Outliers. Those whose history and existence undermines the racial superiority of the Alt Delete. See Albert Einstein, Marie Curie, Rosa Luxemburg, Jesse Owens, Muhammad Ali and Nelson Mandela.

Paleoconservatives: Cautious archeologists.

Pepé Le Peu: Our mascot. Capable of causing a stink anywhere.

Raceys: A badge of pride for those of us who speak as we find. We know who the real deplorables are.

Siegfried Follies Line
: We want to dance, dance, dance into the future.

Signalling/Dog Whistling: You know what we really mean. Don’t you?

Snowflake
: Apparently no two are alike. We don’t like diversity.

Sticky Keyboard: A successful trolling session on social media.

TBTM: That song (Tomorrow Belongs To Me) from the musical ‘Cabaret’. A good tune as well.

Xenos: See Raceys.

We’re creating new phrases, and new narratives, everyday. We’re finding the English language extremely limiting in effectively getting across our vision.

Despite that we’ll be coming to a government near you. Soon.

Dan Boyle is a former Green Party TD and Senator. His column appears here every Thursdyay. Follow Dan on Twitter: @sendboyle

27 thoughts on “The Alt-Delete Movement – All You Need To Know

  1. Cool_Hand_Lucan

    Reminds me of 30 Rock

    Jack: The American public doesn’t want your elitist, east coast, alternative, intellectual, left wing…

    Liz: Jack, just say Jewish, this is taking forever.

  2. bisted

    …ah there’s Dan back…not hiding behind a human shield this week…normal drivel has been restored…

      1. dan

        You felling the fear Dan? Fear of change, fear of moving away from the cosy Irish political landscape where every TD is rewarded handsomely for doing feck all?

        1. Clampers Outside!

          Looks like, he’s cutting through a forest of fear mongering, histrionics and hysteria from the anti-free speech regressives on the left.

          ( All typos were created equally and none were disenfranchised by this comment )

          1. ahjayzis

            Define anti-free speech.

            Refusing to publish hatred in your newspaper isn’t denying anyone any right. You don’t have actually have a right to a column in the Irish Times or a platform on RTE, Clampers, soz.

        2. ahjayzis

          Fear? Fear is the path to the right wing.

          All the alt-right is, all any extreme right wing thinking is, is an increasingly hysterical shriek of fear. Fear of the world, fear of foreigners, fear of women turning you down, fear of your own fragile masculinity being exposed. It’s for little men with little talent.

          Little men find it comforting when weakness like being too afraid to help children in need, the poor, you know, all the things “manliness” should be about – protecting people, is dressed up as machismo. It’s a rebranding of frightened little boys as brave leaders telling hard truths.

    1. Listrade

      Given the change in use of Alt, I think Alt Country now only refers to the right wing racist country music that was heretofore mainstream country.

    1. Louis Lefronde

      Dan, TBTM is an excellent song but may I recommend ‘Schwarzbraun ist die Haselnuss’ for your list.

    2. Daisy Chainsaw

      No, that’s “cracker”, not snowflake. And if it was a racist word for white people, it’s been hijacked by the white alt-right neonazis as an insult for anyone with a wisp of humanity in them.

      1. ahjayzis

        And as another way of shutting down debate. Because their arguments aren’t actually arguments, they’re slogans.

        When what you have are strongly held opinions, and all anyone who disagree does is ‘virtue signal’, i.e. they’re only pretending to disagree with you – no one will ever disagree with you.

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