Rugby Fails And Jumper Puppy Tales



The Ireland women’s Rugby squad 2017

Frilly Keane is back!

Mind your balls.

Frilly Keane writes:

This place has gone all snowflakie in the Trumpanzie era. Have ye noticed a’tall? Or maybe tis the Telly Show getting ye all mannerly and presentable. But you can’t open your trap without some cribbin’ or PG moderating.

A while back when I referred to my tits in a post, it got covered up under “Jumper Puppies” and unusually for me, I took issue with it and kicked back.

Not that I’m anyway precious about what I post on Broadsheet, or how it gets treated, but it was my own set of tits I was referring to, so wtf like. They’re mine, and I can call them what I like.
You don’t see the lads getting their “cockfest” painted over or their “bollix” pruned. Do ya? Your Dah you do.

Sum’ting else you don’t see very clearly; that inherent blind spot Men all have when it comes to how Women are treated in the everyday when under the same circumstances.

I’ve used this one before as an example of what has become commonplace oversight and indifference: If a Woman Candidate for Election – any election any jurisdiction, accepted a Party nomination with 5 children from 3 different fellas, the commentary and direction of the campaign coverage would be very different to yer Man.

And ye know it.

I’ve said this here before too, when it came to her professions, career and livelihood, Hillary Clinton used the very same rule books as many of the lads before her did, and many after her will, and she took a hiding for it. And some of ye are still sniggering about it.

So why can’t I, her, or she use the same rule books as him? Who da’fcuk do ye all think ye are? I go into the same exam hall and face the same exam paper as any lad, I’m assessed for taxes by the criteria as any lad, I can be summoned before a Court Official under the same conditions as any lad,

I pay the same price for diesel as the lad at the other pump, I’m charged the same unit rate for the electricity I consume, yet, when it comes to making a few bob I’m criticised and mocked for being  money grabbing, outspoken and ambitious.

This is not a pitch for Gender Quotas, which I firmly disagree with. I believe in walking the talk, and if I’m not good enough, then I just have to improve my game, or accept the runners up medal.

If I put a new car under my hole its assumed I got a dig out with it, got finance for it and the tis grand for some is its greeting. Whereas the lad will get a how does she drive, what’s her mileage like.

And ye all know it.

In 2008 feedback from a very senior Health Care Exec (now comfortably pensioned) to me in a failed final interview was “The Board was split 50:50 so they went with the man.

Now, I left it go, because I’m not litigious, but mainly because it was easier not to bother me arse drawing the fight on meself – I’d better things t’be getting on with kinda thing. But here’s why I’m bringing it up here, what if the answer was ‘The Board was split 50:50 so they went with the woman.”

I’ll leave that with ye….

Now, here I am, (while still pissed off about my Christmas message not getting aired because, IN MY OPINION, it would have imposed on one of yere lovies), deliberately putting the boot inta the collective misogyny that has become so common place, nobody notices it anymore.

Recently a post appeared from the Ladies Rugby Supporters Group; and to say I was disappointed at the scanty response – is me being nice.

I’m not going to defend the Women’s Game. Of any code.

Nor am I going to deny that I’m more likely to be seen at a Senior Mens game than the Ladies. The Girls, past and present in the Hurling & Football fields throughout the Country have accepted that from the likes of me on the ditch.

But when their County Boards attempted to try it on by limiting their Ladies sides’ resources and opportunity and potential, I’m not behind the door with the ‘hang on there now lads’ and I was never the last in with the cheque for the holiday fund. Even for the Tipp crowd.

And I’m not going to take the soup either, so yere not going to see me hould back with the Rugby crowd or change me tune.

But when they’re our own, no matter what the code or gender, we are all on the one road.

So why isn’t there pull-out Women’s World Cup shyte n’ Player profiles stuffing the weekend papers and spilling off RTE Radio roundabouts?

FFS; There’s more talk about the Ireland Lads girlfriends/wives/ kids than the Ireland Women’s XV. Even more FFSs… an ex-player and his missus would be given more times on the Montrose Couches before the Ireland Ladies, and that’s even if they do bring home the Grand Slam.

I’d love it if the Irish Open was as dissed and ignored as the Women’s World Cup and the Ireland Team Set up, because then the Indo would be appointing a Receiver.

Given what they’ve had to put up with, this Panel of International Players should be the Paddy’s Day Grand Marshals, and if there’s any depth to Mrs Brown’s premise, they should be on her set getting togged out and fed tay.

Mrs Brown, not that I think your brilliantness is anywhere near this gaff, but Ailish, Ailsa, Aine, Alison, Anna, Ciara, Ciara eile, Claire, Claire eile, Cliodhna, Eimear, Elaine, Heather, Ilse, Jemma, Jenny, Katie, Leah, Lindsey, Mairead, Marie- Lou, Mary, Niamh, Niamh eile, Nicola, Nora, Orla, Paula, Ruth, Sene, Sophie … hope I got it right; ARE YOUR BOYS.

As for the IRFU … it really is a big wanky FU. I would love to see a comparison of the money they provided to a former Argentinian International to get a RCSI education and what was stumped up for the current Ladies Training & Prep camps.

In the words of a former Great Irish International, and one of yere very own:

Where’s yere fucking Pride.”

Girls, ye’ll see me at every home game from now on …. not sure about the Shoulder t’ Shoulder carry on but;


Frilly keane’s column usually appears here on the first Friday of every month. Follow Frilly on Twitter: @frillykeane

53 thoughts on “Rugby Fails And Jumper Puppy Tales

  1. mildred st. meadowlark

    Welcome back Frilly, dear, to you and your jumper pups.

    I enjoyed this one. Might have to sit down and have a reread when I don’t have a screaming child attached to my leg.

      1. mildred st. meadowlark

        Oh Bertie… so sweet, so naive.

        I’m a bit closer to a domestic demon. You could call me a House Banshee.

          1. Bertie Blenkinsop

            Sorry Mildred, I was just trying a new tactic one of the lads in work was telling me to try –
            Treat ’em mean, Robbie Keane I think he called it.
            Not really me though is it? :)

          2. mildred st. meadowlark

            No, you’re definitely a softie :)

            You had me worried there for a min. I thought our love was forevz baby.

  2. Jaden

    For some reason, I read this in the voice of Miley from Glenroe.
    The prose style is similar to that of Ulysses, in that it takes at least two rereads of certain parts to discern it’s meaning.

  3. Custo

    You can’t just magic up interest though. The league of Ireland would be thriving if that was the case. Even after the season where Dundalk but to the Uefa cup group stage, and Cork almost made it, and when LOI was front page news and on the telly…even after all that, there was about 1500 at Richmond Park last Friday night cut the opening day of the season.

    While it would be nice, in a perfect world, if the irish women’s rugby team were as well rewarded as their male counterparts, and there were world cup wall charts for the women’s world cup, it’s not going to happen. And even if it did get more coverage, as the LOI has shown, that doesn’t translate in to actual public interest and arses on seats.

    1. Frilly Keane

      I’ve bumped inta that LOI issue meself over in other parishs

      The Clubs need to stand up for themselves
      And get their supporters on the bus
      And into the away stands
      And keep driving for members and growing their base

  4. Mahoney

    women are half the population, just harangue them into not watching or taking any interest in anything men do and give their 100% of their interest to whatever women are doing, problem solved.

    1. Clampers Outside!

      Ah now Eamonn, rugby can be played by both sexes equally.

      Womensplaining or Mansplaining requires that the men or women speaking is speaking about an area of life their gender – there are two – have no experience in, due to their biological differences.
      Such as, a woman telling a man how to put on a condom would be womansplaining because she has no willy;
      Or a man tellin’ a women how to do a breast check and he having no boobs, so he’d be mansplaining.
      But in this instance, women play rugby as do the men, so no ‘splaining required like. It’s murky, what with the idea coming from the ‘scoial sciences’ and not exactly a bedrock of objectivity so it is understandable to get it wrong sometimes…. this was an attempt at droll humour.

      Please note, clarification is often not needed and instruction should not be confussed with ‘splainin’.
      For instance, if you’re in the bed gettin’ coochy with each other and one says to the other, any of the following…
      ‘up a bit’
      or ‘no, not there’
      or ‘faster please’
      or ‘that’s the wrong one’
      or ‘get off me hand’
      and so forth… these instructions are pointers, or guidance if you will and should not be confused with ‘splainin’
      Happy friday y’all ! :)

      1. mildred st. meadowlark

        Clamps, one of the finest comments you’ve posted in a while. I laughed, I cried, I rejoiced.

        Happy Friday to you sir :)

      2. Cian

        erm, no. mansplaining has nothing to do with the ‘speaking about an area of life their gender […] have no experience in’. it’s a man explaining *anything* in a condescending or patronizing manner because they assume that the woman doesn’t know anything about it (because, like, she’s a woman).

        “I’m listening to a guy mansplain economics to his wife”

  5. Ciaran

    How many times have you heard a woman going “He is such a girl” – to belittle ones own gender is never a good start.

    Women’s rugby is at least as good a spectator sport as men’s. I’m more of a league fan myself though.

  6. Rainy Day

    I have written on this issue previously here. A sport, any sport has to be valued on its merits. Rugby can be exciting when it is played at pace, with excellent handling skills and some element of power, when its not it can be a brutally boring watch. Women’s rugby (or at least any game I have seen with the Irish team) has none of those qualities that approach anywhere near what you could consider ‘international’ standard. A game of u-12 boys down in the local rugby club is far more exciting and of a higher standard, when it comes to handling and passing skills anyway.
    Women’s rugby should not be watched or valued just because women are playing it. It should definitely not be on TV for those reasons either.
    Women’s tennis and athletics for example are fantastic sports and stand up to any standard of competitiveness or international excellence. They stand up on their own two feet because they are good to watch not because women are taking part.
    If we value a sport just because of the gender of who is playing it then that is a complete nonsense.

    1. Listrade

      Here’s the problem with that argument Rainy Day, take the Scotland Wales match. It was exciting, but it wasn’t a great game in your purity view of rugby. Very few games are to be honest. Same for soccer, GAA, anything really. for all the times I’ve seen real great sides play my interpretation of a perfect game, I’ve sat through 100 times utter dross, knowing it is dross, being bored by the dross, but still sat there out of habit watching it. It isn’t the quality that’s the issue, it’s habit. The Women’s Soccer World cup has about the same proportion of quality teams as the men’s. Same amount of dross matches and same amount of good and same amount of really great. But you have to dig around on BBC 2 to catch it.

      I’m a Liverpool fan from the 70s. Glory years of the late 70s and 80s. My god we were boring to watch. Our whole game plan was pass back to the keeper and start again [insert Simpsons soccer match clip]. Rugby was the same, kick, chase, maul, kick, chase, maul, snore. But we still watched. So the quality argument is rubbish. We’ll watch anyway.

      You say that the under 12s is more entertaining. Might be, but then just do a bit of googling and see the resources that are put into men’s rugby even at that stage compared to women’s. It’s not fair to compare the two as one isn’t promoted to recruit members, it isn’t funded to have the coaches and training and that’s from the U12s up to International team.

      The U21 internationals aren’t great games either, but they still get more air time than women’s rugby.

      I’m glad you like women’s tennis, I do too. I’m glad that too meets your quality criteria. Pity the awards are still more across the year for the men. The grand slams have only recently (and very reluctantly) introduced equal awards, the other events still have a gap.

      Anyway, quality my a**. We’ll sit through any old dross for the sake of watching a game. It’s about habit and what we’re used to watching. It doesn’t hurt to have a bit more visibility and promotion of the women’s game, especially when they’re kinda good at the moment.

  7. Murtles

    I always have to go searching the internet to see when the next Irish Women’s rugby match is on whereas the Men’s seem to be advertised widely. I do and don’t agree with ya Rainy about the Women’s game being a boring watch, well certainly not the Irish Women’s games I’ve watched in the Six Nations. Yes it’s not wall to wall excitement but what game is but I have seen rucks, passes and bone crushing tackles from the Irish girls that equalled that of the lads. When watching both games there are players that fall into the “Ya wouldn’t want to run into him/her on a dark night”.
    Incidentally for those not following Women’s Rugby, our team have won every match they’ve played in the tournament beating the Scots 22 – 15, the Eye-talians 27 – 3 and the French 13 – 10. Their next match is tomorrow week (11th March) against the Taffys in Cardiff at 11.30am. It’s being broadcast on RTE so take a look. The Women’s World Cup is coming to Ireland later in the year and I’m looking to see how to get tickets for a game or two but I’d find a leprechauns pot of gold quicker. COYGIG.

  8. bisted

    …ah here Frilly…to suggest that gender was the reason why crooked Hillary was rejected by the yanks amounts to denial…I’m not sniggering but I am relieved that this warmonger was defeated…I honestly beliave the world is a safer place without her influence..

    1. AnAccountant

      She wasn’t rejected by the Yanks though. 3 million more of them chose her than that lazy, fragile conman.

      1. bisted

        …crooked Hillary rang Trump long before all the votes were counted and conceded defeat…thats their flavour of democracy…conceding defeat = accepting rejection…weeks before the election she was apoplectic at Trumps suggestion that he mightn’t accept the outcome

  9. Anne

    Frilly, all for the girls..except if they fit into skinny jeans and they show a little drive and have the odd opinion or two – i e. Anne-Marie McNally. Go way out of it.

    Other women are women’s worst enemy, not men. You’ve shown yourself to be no exception to the rule there. You were particularly cruel to Anne-Marie, and getting all indignant for sweet f all, as you do on occasion. “unusual for me i took issue” me hoop. It was never the substance of what Anne-Marie wrote about that you took issue was personally jealousy and cynicism about her motives. The job pays well, the pension is could accuse them all of having the wrong motives, but you didn’t give her a chance. Why? Jealousy, that’s why.

    A taxi driver once told me that whenever he had a few women in the car, and he dropped one of um off, he said the rest of um would usually have a good b*tch about your wan who just got out of the car. It’d be all “night Moire, great night Moire, call you tomorrow Moire..” to her face..
    The minute the car door was closed behind her..
    “Didn’t like her dress at all tonight girls did ye”
    “Nah, she put up a few pounds, she was bustin’ out of it really”
    “Yeah, no wonder she can’t meet a fella..”
    “Ah she might get a sympathy fuk some night from some poor drunk lad”

    And Hillary fupping Clinton..give me a break. Yeah she has jumper puppies too..whoopdy doo. She was probably the least worst choice, that’s not saying much for her. And criticising her and bill and their dodgy foundation and their quid pro quo deals with the likes of Denis O’Brien does not make one a misogynist.

    Welcome back.

    1. Frilly Keane

      I can always rely on “Anne”
      “Anne” never fails to bite, swallow, and then poo poo

      The Social Democrats on the other hand might not be so keen with
      “Anne” flogging their Mansplaining Policy

      Maybe that’s a better answer for Stephen Donnelly
      For the next time someone climbs up his bottom about why he left Anne Marie and the gang

      Keep up the good work.
      And don’t ever change

  10. Anne

    You don’t half show us all your cards “Frilly”.

    Again, there’s nothing in your critiscm of her that’s in relation to the policies. It’s her “mansplaining”. And further cattiness on speculating what the SD are happy to be “flogged”.

    Yeah Hillary has a pair of jumper astute of you to notice. Anything else to say about her? No. That’s it, it seems, she has a pair of jumper puppies, ergo youse are all mysognists.

    When I got me new car they didn’t ask me about it’s mileage…waaaaaah.

    Go way you hypocrite. The men aren’t the problem.

    I’m just off out for a bit of pizza n a me skinny jeans. G’night.

      1. And Social Justice For All

        I’m sure you’re a good writer in there somewhere. You do have good ideas and pick interesting topics. But FFS can you not get someone to edit or proofread your stuff before clicking ‘send’? The unnecessary and wilful colloquialisms detract from your argument. Sorry.

        1. Shayna

          I’m at times blinded also by the colloquialisms. I’ve been to Cork quite a few times, the Corkonians try to mesmorize one by speaking very quickly about nothing in particular repeatedly about nothing in particular, until one is mesmorized by nothing in particular.

  11. Frilly Keane

    Sum’ting to add

    Picked up a flyer in the Aldi yesterday
    Ye’ve probably already see it
    The one with Paul’O on it
    “Together Standing Tall”

    And inside is the “Upcoming Fixtures”
    9th- 27th August 2017 Women’s Rugby World Cup
    Followed by all 13 of the lads Autumn & 6 Nations fixtures, timezones and venues

    Together Standing Tall
    My bootom

    It might only be 1
    But consider yerselves boycotted

    Not that I’m under the allusion Aldi give a ploppy poo-poo
    But I do

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