Last night’s TV3 Leaders’ Debate, from left: Gerry Adams, Enda Kenny, Joan Burton and Micheál Martin
Last night the big wigs of our state,
Together stood up to the plate,
And made some hot air,
As if we would care,
What was said in the heated debate.
Siptu picket at Red Cow Luas station this morning
From Stillorgan and right into town,
The whole of our tram network’s down,
Now the poor middle class,
Must trudge through cold grass,
As they walk into work with a frown.
Pic: Dave Dunne
There were tears yesterday when we all,
Said goodbye to the big fella, Paul,
He helped us to win,
But did his leg in,
While answering old Ireland’s call.
If you’re swimming you’d best watch your back,
Our whole species is under attack,
For that monster: the shark,
Thinks it a great lark,
To take you as a mid morning snack.
Sinn Féin President Gerry Adams,
There isn’t a gangland you know,
It’s a media invention and so,
A jury of peers,
Will be free from all fears,
And will not let murderers go.
A bright cheery fellow named Van,
Discovered young Charlie’s a fan,
Then to his delight,
He made him a knight,
Which is something not many folk can.
Some people are blowing a fuse,
At a prominent provo called Hughes,
He’ll be doing a jig,
At a fundraising gig,
Wearing sequins and bright shiny shoes.
North Korea plans to use ballistic missile technology
A satellite from the far east,
Means everyone’s fears are increased,
Our friend Kim Jong-un,
Just wants to have fun,
But his neighbours all think him a beast.
US Presidential hopeful Ted Cruz (above) emerged as the Republican front-runner in the Iowa caucus last night
Remember that fellow called Trump?
His figures have started to slump,
The Don didn’t choose,
To go out and lose,
But Teddy Boy gave him a thump.
Dr Omar Hassan, who mistook an Xray of an ankle for an arm
A doctor’s a chap who should know,
A sore foot from a broken elbow,
And if he gets it wrong,
Just send him along,
With a reference that can’t help but glow.