a compilation of celebrations gone wrong (and occasionally right) from Fail Army.
Previously: Truck Ups
The Day Stephen Donnelly Joined Foster and Allen
While gutless others shivered
alone in wardrobes of their own making,
debating whether to kill
by strangling, or have sexual intercourse with,
you strode into our national crisis
stage left stylish
as a string quartet about to fiddle out
on viola, cello, Stradivarius
something by the late Benjamin Britten;
a set of implausibly perfect teeth attached
to what sounded like a brain.
Your intelligence so vast
you had to get the builders in
to extend the dome of your skull
to accommodate a Masters
degree from Harvard.
Not content to be the usual
slight disappointment, you reveal
yourself to be the thinking wing
of the Foster and Allen Party; politically flexible
as a cross-community Belfast brothel;
slick as rubbery bacon; aesthetically pleasing
as a Chicken Snack Box thrice reheated
before nine o’clock in the morning
or a third hand pair of trousers grown
pungent with badly digested cabbage;
but destined tonight to be wildly applauded
in darkest Arklow by those who’ll have
the shirts torn from their backs
when next the market crashes.
Annie West tweetz:
Tish and pish to your Bouncy Castle. This was a kids’ birthday Party yesterday
Children were minded.
Minds were chilled.
So, this is the now annual Synge Street street feast in Dublin 8. As usual, it went on well into the night without issue. All thanks to Sharon Greene of “Queens of Neon” fame, not to mention Elaine McGrath, Lex Woo and Dermot of “Mr. Whippy Sound System” fame, as well as several Synge Street residents who each year provide food.
(Pix: Oisín Kane)
Stephen Nutley (what are the chances?) tweetz:
My type of typo.
She wasn’t happy.
I think the photos say it all. She looked dreadful, like she’d left a rave at 6am. Apparently the Elsa outfit had been worn by another entertainer earlier that day and was wet with sweat. So, our entertainer decided to put the outfit on OVER THE TOP over her own clothes, which happened to be black. She didn’t even bother to put the costume shoes on and wore a pair of tatty black flat shoes. The dress came undone at the back, someone did it up for her, but it wouldn’t stay done up, so she left it to hang off. The wig didn’t fit her and she didn’t bother to put any make-up on.
(H/T: Brock Landers)