42 thoughts on “Safe Berth

        1. Bertie Blenkinsop

          I listened to “Hurricane” so much when I was young that I took the good out of it for myself….

  1. Daisy Chainsaw

    Did you know that the bit of the river Thames that flows through Oxford is called the Isis?

  2. Nigel

    There’s a man I meet walks up our street
    He’s a worker for the council
    Has been twenty years
    And he takes no lip of nobody
    And litter off the gutter
    Puts it in a bag
    And never thinks to mutter
    And he packs his lunch in a Sunblest bag
    The children call him bogie
    He never lets on
    But I know ’cause he once told me
    He let me know a secret about the money in his kitty
    He’s gonna buy a dinghy
    Gonna call her dignity

      1. Nigel

        Spent a summer working in a Butlins restaurant in Wales, every morning I’d load bread out of Sunblest bags onto the rotating racks of a big toasting machine with that song pleasantly running through my head.

          1. Nigel

            It did. After serving breakfast we’d sit around drinking tea and eating cold leftover toast, which was somehow even more delicious than when it was fresh and hot.

        1. Andyourpointiswhatexactly?

          I heard someone tinkling away on the piano in some pub in Cork many, many years ago. I had a look as I recognised one of the tunes. Ricky Wotsit from Deacon Blue! Playing away happily. He was still very handsome but somewhat more corpulent. I’m trying to remember: might have been around 1999/2000. I love that song. And chocolate girl.

          1. Nigel

            There was some Bob Dylan cover they did I loved, too, can’t remember what it was, though…

  3. Ting-Tong

    so todays terrorists named themselves after the home place of yesteryears terrorists
    fitting and who knew

          1. Ting-Tong

            it is indeed and my kosher bacon delivery is exceedingly late
            any tips on keeping my customers happy

          2. scottser

            david is probably celebrating the fact that only jews have the right to full autonomy in israel now.

          3. Ting-Tong

            i was buying quorn steaks the other day and the man on the check out said I needed to try the quorn sausage
            wasn’t sure if that was a genuine tip or if it was innuendo
            anyone?

          4. Ting-Tong

            heres a question for you papi
            if you went in the same shop every week and were served by the same person who was always pleasant and friendly
            then one week
            which was last week
            he tells you to have a great weekend with a big smile and winks
            well what does that mean with the wink like?
            this is a real question
            I don’t understand men and can’t decode them

          5. Ting-Tong

            yes quorn steaks are lovely just like chicken to all intents and purposes
            I get the ones in garlic and herb crumb or coating

          6. Papi

            He may love you and wish to copulate. What kind of shop is also important. If you were stocking up on a gallon of lube, that would explain the wink.

          7. Ting-Tong

            it was actually my local post office
            didn’t want to say incase he’s a broadsheeter
            I’m coy like that

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