Do My Lyrics Amuse You?


Last week, with a Twenty Five Euro Golden Discs voucher on offer, we asked you to recall the funniest lyrics you’ve ever heard in a decent song.

You answered in your dozens.

But there could be only one winner.

In reverse order then…

Half Man Half Biscuit – 4AD3DCD

Spudnick writes:

Half Man Half Biscuit. For the song titles alone:
Back in the DHSS
Dickie Davies Eyes
I Love You Because (You Look Like Jim Reeves)
Voyage to the Bottom of the Road
We Built This Village on a Trad. Arr. Tune
Four Lads who Shook the Wirral
All I Want For Christmas Is A Dukla Prague Away Kit.
And, from 4AD3DCD (above): ‘Never mind ‘I’ve played postal chess / With a man who doesn’t know me / I’ve got a better frown than Tony Iommi’

Citizen Smith – Naughty Urban Guerilla

Slightly Bemused writes::

OK, showing my age here, but i think the funniest lyrics are from a song by Wolfie Smith and the Tooting Popular Front:

Well the rich kids’ fun was over and they knew who to blame
It was the presence of some peasants who just wouldn’t play the game
The party wasn’t over yet but I’ve got this kind of hunch
That some naughty urban guerrilla put some laxative in the punch…

Bell X1 – Rocky Took A Lover

SB writes:

The funniest lyrics contained in a decent song are
But you weren’t so nice last night
You’re such an asshole when you’re drunk’
And he said, ‘At least I’m okay in the mornings’
‘if there was a God, then why is my arse the perfect height for kicking?’

Pulp – Common People

Stan writes:

The funniest lyrics contained in a decent song are in Common People by Pulp:
‘She Said…….”I want to sleep with common people, like you”/ Well what else could I do?/ I said ‘I’ll see what I can do”

The Divine Comedy – National Express

Steve writes:

The funniest lyrics contained in a decent song are by Divine Comedy:
‘On the National Express there’s a jolly hostess
Selling crisps and tea
She’ll provide you with drinks and theatrical winks
For a sky-high fee
Mini-skirts were in style when she danced down the aisle
Back in ’63 (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
But it’s hard to get by when your arse is the size
Of a small country
And everybody sings ‘ba ba ba da”


George Carlin – Modern Man

Joe writes:

Try and beat thi… by a 70+ year old before being woke, #metoo, Kardashians, snowflake….It may not be music per se but it is rap and better than Eminiem… spoken word poetry can be musical sometimes but this is bad ass jazz comedy…For everything else there’s Curtis Mayfield

Thanks all.

Last week: Funny How?

Golden Discs

Sponsored Link

11 thoughts on “Do My Lyrics Amuse You?

Comments are closed.

Sponsored Link