92 thoughts on “Friday’s Papers

  1. goldenbrown

    ohno…Frank Of Ireland :(
    I really really wanted it to work but I think it was just awful

    hey am I first?

    1. Praetorian

      In total agreement….gave it seven minutes….dreadful stuff.
      Surprised the Gleeson dynasty signed up to it.

      1. Redundant Proofreaders Society

        The trailer looked awful. Another production celebrating mock-Irish-idiocy.

          1. Papi

            Like a terrier down a rat hole, there’s the pompous hypocrite, being, as we all know, a racist bigot.
            Congratulations charger.

      1. Paulus

        Yes it wasn’t the worst, the final church scene was the weakest.
        Jeez, Beardy Gleeson not only looks like, but sounds like his da.

  2. ce

    Main headline write for the Star must be on a well deserved holiday… open goal with some fart jokes, just seems like they didn’t even try…

    Personally, I would have gone for “Chap in court for cutting one loose on a Copper”… maybe they’ll hire me and I’ll finally have a real job

      1. U N M U T U A L

        The pic of Colins chocolate log next to the banner is nice touch…! Talk about a twofor.

    1. Cú Chulainn

      Have to agree here ce.. I’m holding on to the hope the main headline writers are ill.. or had to return to their country of origin after brexit… this current fair just doesn’t cut the mustard … if the psycho gulls don’t make an appearance over the weekend all might be lost.. at least we know you can step in to fill the breach..

      1. U N M U T U A L

        @Cu
        A little re-branding might reflect the tone of the paper… might I suggest, Weekly Wormed News.

  3. Charger Salmons

    Once again it’s the readers of the Irish Times who are doing the proper reporting not their hacks.

    Sir, – “80 per cent of adults will receive a first dose of a vaccine by the end of June” (News, February 21st). “80 per cent of adults will receive an offer of a first dose of a vaccine by the end of June” (News, April 14th).

    Spot the difference. – Yours, etc,

    RORY E MacFLYNN,

    Blackrock,

    Co Dublin.

    1. jungleman

      Yes, I noticed this also. Very spinny.

      Reminds me of Johnson saying he had an oven-ready deal for brexit and then later claiming he was referring to the withdrawal agreement.

    1. Cú Chulainn

      I have watched about 20 minutes of the Late Late show in the last 10 years and I can tell you all about the intimate details of Imelda May’s sex life. Everything. I don’t want to know about her sex life. Only Ryan Turgidity seems to want to know about her sex life. I’m being assailed just being here. Please make it stop.

      1. Charger Salmons

        I adore Imelda May.
        Sublime singer, fiesty woman and born survivor in a very tough business.
        If she’s good enough to be a long-time Jools Holland favourite she’s good enough for me.
        I could listen to her talking about her sex life all day long.
        Which I’m sure is how long it lasts.

        Wahaay !

  4. Formerly known as @ireland.com

    Embryo made from monkey and human – beside a pic of Charlie Battenberg.

  5. GiggidyGoo

    Varadkar trying his best the become relevant.
    How’s the Criminal investigation into his leaking going?

    1. Harry

      Varadkar really needs a better scriptwriter all of those media people Fine Gael hired are useless. Each time he attacks any political party they go up the charts in the next poll.

    2. Anti Bots

      Hey bot, is it not embarrassing that your party is tracking everyone online, from a Serbian website. You couldn’t even use a nordy website. United Ireland my xxxx. Am I going to be tracked now for posting this comment. Will Mossad or the Russians be involved.

    1. Charger Salmons

      By who ?
      Some chinless wonder gave him such an easy ride on Prime Time last night it was patently obvious even he couldn’t believe his luck.
      And senior politicians like Mehole are more than happy to do The Tonight Show these days because they know there’s no-one like Vincent Browne who will give them a mauling.
      There isn’t a single heavyweight political interviewer working on Irish TV today.
      Deference is ingrained in the Irish DNA.

    2. Anti Bots

      Hey bot, is it not embarrassing that your party is tracking everyone online, from a Serbian website. You couldn’t even use a nordy website. United Ireland my xxxx. Am I going to be tracked now for posting this comment. Will Mossad or the Russians be involved.

      1. Unreal

        He has a mobile data processing unit in the back of the van – that Transit out on your estate isn’t a roofer having a breakfast roll, it’s a Giggidy special ops mission tracking when you have a shiiiiiitttttteee hai
        Only special dark brown coloured turds are “real” SF voters – has to be solid as well – any watery or residue etc might be a bit too centrist

    3. Anti Bots

      Hey bot, not a word about the RA bots. Seriously, that must be embarrassing. Serbia , no less. Would they be your cousins for drugs, people and human trafficking. Oh sorry, we guys don’t do that. Do you pay them in euro or sterling? Criminals. And yet you give out about everyone, with silly names, just like Trump. 2 faced or what?

  6. Donald McCarthy

    I’m sort of sure that the complete absence of extinction tales is not directly designed to trigger me. My Doom for Dummies course seems not to have caught on but for those who would like an accredited course in the mongering of doom field I am offering a little test. Scientists have identified nine planetary boundaries, each representing an existential threat and none which can be safely crossed. Amusingly, they go on to assure us that four have already been passed. Can you tell which four from the following list? Climate change, bio-diversity loss, ocean acidification, atmospheric aerosol pollution, freshwater use, biogeochemical flows, land system change and release of novel chemicals.

    1. Harry

      It makes me feel nostalgic for the past, oil running out by the year 2000, the Commies are coming to take over the world, nuclear Armageddon….add your favourite doom scenario :)

      1. U N M U T U A L

        Don’t forget, GVS… Gates Visionary Syndrome aka The millennium bug, better known as Windows 2000…

        Bring back the Murder Hornets, is what I say!

  7. Charger Salmons

    Boom !
    The Tory Toffs are now 14 points ahead of Labour in the latest opinion poll, their biggest lead since last spring.

    CON: 43% (+2)
    LAB: 29% (-5)
    GRN: 8% (+2)
    LDEM: 8% (+2)
    REFUK: 3% (-)
    via
    @YouGov

    And the poll was taken before Blighty’s pubs and restaurants re-opened this week.
    Clearly the great British public do not hold Boris responsible for how the pandemic has panned out, particularly now the vaccination steamroller is flattening Covid.
    Sir Kneel-a-lot is in for a long summer.
    Snap election anyone ?
    Marvellous™

    1. ce

      “Clearly the great British public do not hold Boris responsible for how the pandemic has panned out” – if only Oxford Astra could make a vaccine against stupid…

        1. ce

          Maybe we can shake hands and call an end to the snark for the day… oh wait you don’t shake hands in a pandemic

          1. Charger Salmons

            You’re in Chump’s Corner mate.
            Why not toddle off and play in the sand with Nappy ?
            You could become the Beavis and Butthead of Broadsheet.

          2. scottser

            All charger has is ‘stupid paddy’ comments these days. He’s just a walking stereotype..

          3. Charlie

            He’s angry too. They didn’t boot him off another site for being nice. Hey it’s Friday! Watch him spin into turbo chav mode now that it’s the weekend and his daily wine intake quadruples.

          4. ce

            Now, now, no need to go and sulk – I would have thought all the Eton-fagging you took would have given you a thicker skin

    2. Charlie

      “Clearly the Great British public don’t hold Boris responsible for how the pandemic has planned out…”
      Ha, yet he was the slowest to act when the pandemic broke out and 150,000 were surplus to requirements. The great British public have very short memories(unless you want to talk about 1966). I’ve said it many times and I’ll say it again, they’re the most gullible people on the planet.

  8. Charger Salmons

    Brexit news ( remember that ? )
    According to a survey of chief financial officers by the accountancy firm Deloitte, 80% of bosses believe Britain will make strong recovery from the pandemic.
    And Brexit has dropped from being their top worry to seventh place.
    The noisy in confidence helped push expectations for hiring and business investment to the highest level in almost six years, with respondents saying they anticipate rising profits over the next year.
    Two-thirds think most of their employees will return to the office by the autumn.
    Britain will be fully open for business in a matter of weeks.

    1. ce

      “Two-thirds think most of their employees will return to the office by the autumn”

      Should be a bit more leg room on the transport into work thanks to the 150000 deaths…

      Anyway, well done Blighty – when you’re lying on the floor the only way is up… huzzah!

  9. Junkface

    The ‘New hate crime laws’ is a potentially worrying development mentioned in the Irish Times. I really hope that the government have done some seriously accurate and sensible research on this. Do you trust our government with this matter? We do not want to follow Scotland into an absolute dystopian mess, trouncing all over the individuals rights at home and free speech. I mean it is shocking how Scotland have completely f***ed this up for their citizens.

      1. Junkface

        Telling jokes always has a context to consider. This guy made a stupid joke in his own home, pretending his partner’s dog was a nazi, posted a video online and got prosecuted for it. That’s insane!

        They completely disregarded the context under the new laws.

        1. ce

          What the judge said in court about context was terrifying… and all the woke comedians did nothing to protest about it… can’t wait until our first similar situation… like the Lotto, it could be you!

        1. Junkface

          Yes I always enjoyed his history documentaries about Scotland and Britain in the middle ages on BBC. I never knew his point of view with regards to Scottish independence until I saw this podcast, but it is completely understandable from his point of view and eduction in History. You live and learn.

          1. Charger Salmons

            The problem is the SNP has the Scottish media largely under its control.
            And the London broadcasters such as the BBC treat Sturgeon like a kilt-wearing Greta McThunberg.
            Voices like Mr Oliver’s rarely get heard while others fear the online retribution it will bring so keep quiet.
            It has allowed the SNP a free ride with few journalists prepared to expose its dire record in office.

      1. Daisy Chainsaw

        As soon as I see it’s from Youth Defence’s Grifter blog, I know it’s nothing of import.

        1. Charger Salmons

          But how do you know Diasy ?
          Passing judgement on something you haven’t bothered to read is the sign of a narrow mind and I always had you down as being a little brighter than most of the dimwits on here.

  10. Papi

    Today’s project.
    Is chargers inherent racism a product of having a racist father, or the complete and utter lack of one?
    Discuss.

      1. Papi

        I have the preliminary report, it’s completely unique in the record. It has two floors, burials in both, cremations and inhumations. A totally new type of megalithic monument.
        It’s the farmer who deserves the credit though, stopped the work and has basically donated the field for it.

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