Your Kid’s Drawings – Heartlessly Reviewed


Lisa, age 6

“Holy shit, I almost had a seizure when I saw this one. Three words: too many colours. Also, eggs aren’t supposed to have ears, dipshit.”

Kyle, age 5

“What did your papa do yesterday? WHAT DID HE DO? I’m a grown man. I own a machete, and I shave my beard & neck twice a week. This genuinely frightens me.”

Jill, age 8

“Nice proportions, shit head. The orange looks like a plum, the strawberry like a pineapple, and your future like unemployment.”

Submit you little darling’s effort to the nice man here.

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