Broadsheet Trailer Park: Stolen

at
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dffRGfNwuno

What you may need to know.

1. Nicolas Cage is the Ghost Rider, for real, only he’s trapped in b-movie hell.

2. Cage movies have increasingly generic titles these days: Trespass (2011), Justice (2011), Stolen. Even we can’t tell the difference between Next (2007) and Knowing (2009).

3.Co-star Josh Lucas was supposed to be the new Matthew McConaughey. How’s that working out?

4. Lucas appears to be playing the role Nick Cage would have played back when he wasn’t sleep-walking through one shit film after another.

5. Even Danny Houston can’t liven this bird up, and we do love Danny Houston.

6. Back in the day, Stolen director Simon West and Cage did Con Air (1997). We’d still go a sequel. Wonder if Colm Meaney’s available?

7. Fact: at the 1’30 point, this movie turns into an even WORSE movie.

8. The Big Question: Jesus… Exactly how big is that tax bill he’s trying to pay off?

Release Date (Ireland): Xtravision by Halloween, we reckon.

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