Forever Alone Admin at 3:32 pm July 29, 2014 Tumblr use Emily received a message from a man on OK Cupid but, before responding, made sure to check his profile, where she found the following ‘Don’t message me if…’ list. Emily sez: Jesus Christ thepoke (H/T: John Gallen) FacebookTwitterPinterest
what’s a bulky accent?
What’s wrong with Zombie walks???
The pedo remark is a real run for the hills indicator.
Back away from the “nice” man now Emily….
I agree with 90%+ of this guy’s deal breakers. Zombie walks are infuriating for reasons an average pleb will never understand.
If it wasn’t for that daily showering requirement, we’d be made for each other.
He lost me at bacon
No bacon?! I’m sorry, this relationship will never work.
bacon is its own food group
The transgender comments are a little contradictory
“Don’t belittle them” but then hey “Don’t you look weird”.
Also “feminism is important” and “don’t believe that gender is cultural”.
I got 14.
I didn’t see contrary on the list.
I only got seven! Maybe I actually have a chance with him.
By practicability, I assume he means practicality?
I think its an Americanism, he also referred to the ‘sidewalk’
That’s ABM’s brother.
Seems a bit anti religion for that. ABM is also a fan of royalty, isn’t he?
Also is it specifically those three films, or is it okay to hold one as a favorite?
This chap has succesfully excluded every human female in the western world, he may also be slightly demanding.
In fact I’ll wager he is looking for an Elle McPhearson Look a like who fits his list… Reach for the stars weird dater guy, reach for the stars!
I keep thinking how much fun it would be to go on a date with him and see how many of these traits you get through before he walks out. I’m guessing a lot because he’s probably very lonely.
I keep thinking how much fun it would be to go on a date with him and end up chopped up into tiny bits and dumped in the Liffey in bin liner bags.
Don’t homicidal psychopaths tend to be charming?
Ah, no one’s perfect..
He seems quite particular this fella, he’d probably use strong durable bin bags and leave you out on a Tuesday for the Greyhound guys rather than litter the river with ya.
Just sayin’? hmm. I think you’ve put a bit of thought into that one.
And there was me thinking butter wouldn’t melt..
And a week later he would add
– you work for greyhound waste disposal
…oh but, butter would, butter suuuuuuure would *flutters eyes*
I don’t know, I kind of agree with a huge amount of these things, I just wouldn’t exclude someone from my life/penis because of them.
Meh! pretending to be serious sort of fella who’s not just after a shag. I wonder how long he worked on this pasta.
If you listen to the Doors….Number 1….WTF.
This guy’s done me a favour. Now I’m listening to The Doors.
Fair play to ya Roisin and don’t forget to have a beer for breakfast tomorrow morning.
Breakfast of champions.
I kind of agree with him on that one. I agree with him on a lot of it, but (with the exception of a few) none would be deal breakers.
Second that. The Doors are only ok
Did yiz’ get yer Garth Brooks refunds yet?
Hey, I admit to liking trash but I’m not that bad
I tried but apparently I would have had to have bought a ticket in the first place.
He’s right – overrated. Right about a lot of the other stuff too.
The tagline on her Tumblr:
“i’m emily and the okcupid post ruined my life”
Dang it, I’m out for these six reasons:
-tell people they have to watch tv show
-browse photos of cats
-more than one profile photo
-pet mystery cats
-take part in zombie walks
Jaysus, thank god that OK Cupid site is free. He wouldn’t want to be pulling that sort of fussy crap on a pay dating site.
My wife exhibits none of those deal breaking traits and I love her beyond words.
Ha ha ha…this guy is fussy fecker of the year! He’ll never get a relationship, except with Pam and her five sisters.
This man really wants to be alone for ever. I’ve one requirement for him, don’t be so bloody judgemental.
You just know this guy would keep a spreadsheet.
What an idiot! I’ll wear my bike helmet if I damn well please. Plenty of people say helmets affect peripheral vision. All the better for not seeing Mister List-er if he’s cycling alongside.