They’re Picking On Julien

at

mercille

Bodger: “Who the fupp are?”

Chompsky: “The strange boys from the Village.”

Bodger: “Stinking rotters.”

Chompsky: “They’ve a girl with them.”

Bodger: “Leave Julien’s face for pity‘s sake.”

Almost whimsically and perhaps in closet guilt at the apparent libertarianism of its no doubt mostly junior advertising exec readership (it promotes, nay ogles, Julien Mercille, conspiracy theorist extraordinaire, Maître Mitty on a Monday. Worse still – and alien to the “get that state out of my life readership, this is a leftie. “Beef cake”, ” boffin”, “egghead”, “the man they all want to marry”: all bouffant hair and sallow skin, his clean-cut just-bathed Canadian earnestness, an embodiment of dissent for Broadsheet’s hirsute, lycra-clad, hashtag revolutionaries.

Ow.

Noms de Plume such as “FluffyBiscuits”, “Spaghetti Hoops” (sic) and “Bodger”: words synonymous with childhood innocence…

A kick in the plumes?

….a Freudian nod perhaps to the infantilism of Broadsheet, where ‘Animal Farm’ meets Old McDonald and Broadsheet ends up confusing our furry friends with the Irish electorate?

*nuzzle*

Broadsheet and its commentariat are – dare I say it – profoundly Catholic in tone, devoutly intolerant of any counterweight to the individualistic, hipster agenda. Its commenters and posters drown in a pool of contradictions, one minute decrying “Je suis Charlie”, the next putting the boot into “Ich bin Hitler” merchants. And what’s going on with over 20 posts about the Fuehrer?

Reich so.

To meet the standards imposed by Broadsheet editorially, the poster requires just a talent to irritate the commenter merely the ability to circumnavigate a crude filter. Though there are suspicions that one John Ryan posts under more than one Nom and some of the commenters seem suspiciously on-message.

Literally preposterous.

And there’s more (link below) so much more.

It’s a bloodbath.

The stakes couldn’t be lower.

Confessions Of A Broadsheet Addict (Julia Tuohy, Village)

Sponsored Link

189 thoughts on “They’re Picking On Julien

  1. Mister Mister

    They’re right about Julien in fairness, I called it a while back. Damn Villagers robbing my opinions.

    1. PT

      A deliciously wicked summation of Julian’s media analysis. Juicy Julia or is that Jane Tuohy. Am confused.

          1. Bad At Memes

            Calm down Clampers!
            Anne probably meant ‘infantilism”.

            But what was meant by that is beyond me.
            Ask Anne. He knows more than I do.

          2. Tom

            “Noms de Plume such as “FluffyBiscuits”, “Spaghetti Hoops” (sic) and “Bodger”: words synonymous with childhood innocence, a Freudian nod perhaps to the infantilism of Broadsheet, where ‘Animal Farm’ meets Old McDonald and Broadsheet ends up confusing our furry friends with the Irish electorate?

            This is so just mean.. I need some snuggily wugglys now..

    1. Annie

      The hilarious irony though is that Broadsheet have brought Julia Tuohy and her “article” far more attention than she would ever get in Village Magazine. LOL.

  2. St. John Smythe

    It’s intentionally overwritten, right? This is supposed to be part of the humour..?
    And would it have been so difficult to find out how to type an ü?

      1. St. John Smythe

        its acceptable but poo, I live in Germany and do occasional work designing websites. With the exception of the URL, its been a while since you had to avoid the umlaut, or do the old ü

        1. St. John Smythe

          …do the old & u uml ; (Broadsheet turned my first version into a proper umlaut)

    1. Tidy Dave

      Right on brother. Managed to crank out “Maître”, thus revealing their lazyness or ignorance/contempt of keyboard layout settings and/or the German language.

      Schade.

    2. Annie

      I love Julia Tuohy’s deliberately and painfully verbose de trop ‘writing’ style – it won’t be long before Spiked Magazine snap her up!

      1. seany_delight

        I at least don’t have to look at the adverts on the page.
        No idea if it still registers as a click or view and the site publishers get paid or not.

        1. MajorThrill

          Usually not. If the ad widget is blocked the it doesn’t load the image. So the image wasn’t asked for by the site and nothing happened from the provider’s perspective.. The village site might pass on their own stats about what adverts they think they served and what they should get paid but usually the ad provider’s stats are gospel.

          (Source: I’m totally fun at parties and work in the software dev part of that godforsaken industry)

      2. neil

        seany would rather not feed the trolls through the ad impressions they would be paid for, if he didn’t have AdBlock installed.

  3. Just sayin'

    Well, BS has evolved over a few years from just a few cheap laughs and things that look like Ireland to a strong social commentary. Maybe that’s intentional but I just come here for the laughs – been a while since I actually laughed out loud. I used to do it all the time a few years back.
    I’d like to see their mission statement to figure out what they think is the purpose of their website.

    1. ABM

      “strong social commentary” LOL. How about cheerleading the destruction of the family, promoting the criminalisation of Catholicism, wanting to wipe Israel off the map, the promotion of Mosque building, the forced indoctrination of 5 year-olds about gay daddy, gender identity and trannies. All the time leading 10,000s of souls astray by promoting lifestyle buggery and “sex worker” Utopia.

      1. Bacchus

        tell me more about this “lifestyle buggery”. ‘Tis better to give than receive I hear.

      2. Lush

        You didn’t get a mention in the article either; it wouldn’t be the same without you though.

      3. Annie

        Fake ABM for sure! LOL – “lifestyle buggery” – tis the stuff of the real ABM’s dreams!

  4. The Old Boy

    The impertinence! Don’t they know the only people allowed to denigrate viciously Broadsheet’s editorial decisions are those who haunt the comments section?

  5. Art_Vanderlay

    She opened a bracket in that Mercille bit that didn’t get closed and its freaking me out. Several other parentheses come and go but the original never gets closed. She’s definitely going to read this, so Jane could you close that bracket please? I’m not gonna sleep a wink tonight..

  6. scottser

    are they picking on our fluffy and our hoop?
    *rolls up sleeves, spits on hands, clenches fists

        1. Clampers Outside!

          It’s funny how so many come on here and say the place is anti-Catholic, yet, here she says the place is “profoundly Catholic in tone” …hmmmm, that one threw me…

          But this line’s a cracker… “devoutly intolerant of any counterweight to the individualistic, hipster agenda”.

          I KNEW IT, BLEEDIN’ HIPSTERS HAVE AN AGENDA, JUST LIKE THE GAYS DID !

          Slagging hipsters is like shooting fish in an open barrel suspended two foot from the mouth of a blunderbuss. Taking it all seriously though, well….. that’s just whoooooooshy now, in fairness :)

          1. Joe the Lion

            I think she means most people here are oddly judgemental and hypocritical about anything other than their own pet peeves- I agree

          2. rotide

            Of course she’s right about that. A lot of what she said has obviously hit a collective nerve.

          3. John E. Bravo

            Maybe the subeds mistakenly uppercased the C and she just meant ‘diverse’ and ‘all-embracing’.

  7. ahjayzis

    “no doubt mostly junior advertising exec readership”

    Sorry, but I’m not sure people in advertising can read.

    1. Mick Flavin

      I’ve often wondered in what field most commenters here work. I get the impression a fair few work in graphic design or the like.

        1. Mick Flavin

          I can only draw faces, Joe, abstract concepts are out. Unless you mean Bob. In which case, I’d give him a go.

          Oh, you meant the *dole*…Yes, under several aliases.

          1. Joe the Lion

            Mick

            Has the dole a face that looks like Ireland?

            As ding dong Denny O’reilly would say Waterford would be the arse. Think spare van!

    1. scottser

      ‘Broadsheet and its commentariat are – dare I say it – profoundly Catholic in tone,’

      and just plain wrong.

      1. Drogg

        Yeah you all are the most disagreeable bunch going. I come here for the disagreement of opinion because there is very rarely a consensus so it helps me keep perspective on my own opinions about things.

          1. Drogg

            I only wish they made skinny jeans for a man of my standings, in saying that though if i start cycling a fixie i could be in skinny jeans by the time the next tragic fashion trend rolls round.

        1. Janet, I ate my avatar

          I only come here after a pint when I’ve a touch of homesickness and miss me mammy

    2. Mick Flavin

      “Rococo Wafflings” sounds like a brand of crisps exclusive to Fallon and Byrne.

  8. daveray

    They won’t post any comments, the message “Hold on, this is waiting to be approved by Village Magazine” shows up. Cowards.

    1. rotide

      ….because you never get that message here?

      In fairness to the admins here, they usually approve stuff pretty quickly. Maybe everyone in village has gone for a pint.

          1. Domestos

            For posterity perhaps, not infamy though at this stage. I’ve laid out my thoughts on Julien’s “economics” already, straight out of the Michael Taft land of make believe. And my “nom de plume” has a childproof cap for God’s sake.

  9. Odis

    An overly verbose critique that covered most things but left out John Moynes, for some reason.

    1. Stephen

      I actually like Moynes. And after the excellent work on [REDACTED] and the Thin Blue Timeline I can forgive Broadsheet any irrelevancies

      1. Tidy Dave

        Yeah but even the Moynes-bashing is part of the BS culture. Honestly, I think if he did a video to demonstrate the metre of some of the more, eh, advanced Limericks I’d probably end up liking them a lot more.

        Also: He has a Godlike beard in my book (this is not the Catholic tone you are looking for).

        1. bisted

          …at the risk of sounding homophonic…Broadsheet has always been more meter and mitre than metre…and Moynes is tokenistic proof of that.

          1. John E. Bravo

            Moynes is a poetic extension of the Irish Water protest, doggedly opposed to any standardisation of meters.

  10. linbinius

    Just pissy about the good press this place received after the DOB “scandal”. They didn’t get much of mention around that time…

    The piece is rubbish. At least BS is somewhat self-aware. I think.

  11. nellyb

    Oh la la :-) I like the angst fused with existential tiredness, Will Self-ishly created adjectives – so Broadsheet!
    Brilliant :-)

  12. Optimus Grime

    Well I am outraged about the Catholic outrage won’t someone please think of the children of Broadsheet!

    1. B Bop

      Blah blah we’ve been through the Catholic/non Catholic freak out over Educate Together.
      Less children on BS more dogs in outfits.

  13. collynomial

    I actually do post under two names but the second one is by accident and comes about when someone else has been using my computer.

  14. Jack Ascinine

    Two words; Village Magazine. Tells you all you need to know.

    Hey Vincent, how’s that big lawsuit going that the Village idiots were to launch last September?

    I don’t like the majority of the liberal bleeding hearts on this site but I’ll take one of them over Vincent Browne or the stupid (Person) that wrote the article.

    1. B Bop

      Ah Jack, you shimmied in there with your “Village Idiot” (though nice usage of Vinnie Brown)
      I was saving that indeed for the author of said article!

  15. Exclamation Mark

    Someone take away her wiffy code. Tough one for Mercille seeing as he’s written for them before.

  16. Caroline

    The article seems to be addressed to someone other than the reader. Perhaps it is an offering to a strange god we’d best not offend.

    Shame really, she went to a lot of effort and captured exactly none of the essence of the site. Which is probably just as well.

  17. dereviled

    A hirsute, lycra-clad, hashtag conspiracy.
    Well I can safely say I don’t know what’s going on : )

    1. Continuity Jay-Z

      Yeah, Not getitng the lycra comment at all at all at all.

      And I look f**kin’ hot in lycra because I’m ripped.

      Like, comnpletely swole.

      But in a super hot way.

  18. Joe the Lion

    Has she a face that looks like Ireland?

    As ding dong Denny O’reilly would say Waterford would be the arse

  19. Dubloony

    I read it. She doesn’t like us?
    *snif *, I’ll… I’ll just going quietly sob in the corner. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine…..

  20. rotide

    What’s funny about this is that not only is she generally pretty on the money about broadsheet, it’s obvious that she not only quite likes the website for all its faults but posts here too.

    Of course the knee jerk reaction is one of attack, nerves hit etc

    particularly liked this:
    Even Village, doctrinaire as it is, deigns to allow dissenters: John Waters and Ruth Cullen. Constantin Gurdgiev with his Beckettian opaqueness. But Broadsheet only posts counter-liberal perspectives in a way that invites attack.

    1. Mick Flavin

      I tend to agree with you, Rotide. She didn’t say anything harsh that didn’t have a ring of truth. The style is overblown and haughty, but I take it that’s on purpose…it reinforces the fact that she likes BS imo. It wasn’t a hatchet job, and would she have bothered putting in so much effort otherwise?

      People getting offended are feeding what is in essence a fairly harmless troll attempt writ large. Sure didn’t it give us all something to talk about anyway…

    2. Clampers Outside!

      Havin’ read all the comments more than once… there be no attack, couple of.. two… snides maybe, but that’s it. Most of had a laugh… it was a fun piece :)

    3. Joe the Lion

      Agree with this rotide

      However don’t misconstrue the fake ‘balance’ of rival media outlets as some form of nirvana

      Before the last election for example Dinnytalk was heavily staffed with Mortell, Gavin Duffy and other pro FG touts

  21. Niall

    Infantilism still better than clientelism! G’wan the Broadsheet — keep up the good work!

  22. Parochial Central

    The Village? Those environmental, @Labour, and TCDSU wanquers? Who cares? They carry around their resentments like a stink.

  23. Parochial Central

    Knowing John Ryan’s flair for business I’d say Julia Tuohy is, y’know like… actually him.

  24. follow me, silently

    It’s an awful opinion piece in so many ways. The writing style is terrible and almost all of the descriptions and thinking is not great. It’s so pseudo-intellectual.

      1. scottser

        Ah seriously broadsheet, what the fupp? If there’s any criticism of this site its your tendency to delete comments for no good reason.

  25. Annie

    Love it!

    Julia Tuohy, delightfully outdoing herself with her low-rent Ian O’Doherty look-at-them ever-so-studied contrarianism. It’s the sort of dross Niamh Horan would be embarrassed to submit.

    And it is Julien who is the conspiracy theorist extraordinaire? Quite amusing. You make it too easy dear Julia.

    Now, back to my Friday drinks with my advertising start-up hipster colleagues…

    1. Annie

      Any chance you would consider giving Julia a chance to field some posts Broadsheet? PLEASE!

  26. magazine village

    Seemed like a pretty spot on article to me.

    Poor clampers hahaha, will someone please give that poor sod a guest article or something.

  27. Bad At Memes

    ….the narcissism….
    …it’s too strong Captain….
    -She cannae take it!
    She’s gonna blow!

    (I estimate about 300 comments before this post dies. That’s roughly 300 too many.)

  28. KirkenBrenner

    Ridiculous.. She didn’t even mention the censorship and constant Simpsons quotes.

    1. Bad At Memes

      The censorship doesn’t exist, okay?
      -Don’t mention it again or you’ll be banned.

  29. Jared Katooie

    Clearly Broadsheet needs to get John Waters on here ASAP just to prove Julia wrong.

    Actually wait, never mind.

  30. Zarathustra

    Ah here, my comment’s gone! Was it for this? Infamy! Infamy! They all have it infamy!

    1. Nice Anne (Dammit)

      Please give us the rest of the list of what we “have to do” cos you know EVERYONE loves being told what they have to do by randommers on the interwebs…

  31. TheFerg

    Thy is doth what thy cometh, thou most broadest of thine sheets……..(stares off into the distance and poses for existential London Irish photo-op)

  32. Bonkers

    I would have thought it would be hard to write an article about BS without going into decent detail of the latest attempt by Redacted to bully the media he doesn’t own (this on top of his seventy legal letters to Irish journalists). BS was brave in the face of legal threat when the entire Irish media folded over but yet Julia only deems it worthy of a quick throw away remark? And to leave out Clampers altogether, the shame !

  33. Spaghetti Hoop

    You’ve no idea what this has done to the Hoop family name.
    P.S. Is Broadsheet hot?

    Smokin’.

  34. H

    I’m curious now, can all the John Ryan’s please stick your hands up so I can see just how many of the commentariat are sock puppets?

    I’m sure no-one else on here has ever done such a thing….

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