Anything Good On Done Deal?

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You know, a household with money’s a little like the mule with a spinning wheel. No one knows how he got it, and danged if he knows how to use it.

(Heh heh heh… mule)

The name’s Coughlan, Aidan Coughlan, and I come before you good people today with a sofa. Probably the greatest – actually, it’s not for you. It’s more of a… Shelbyville sofa.

What’s that? You’re twice as smart as the people of Shelbyville?

Well alright. I’ll tell you what I’ll do: I’ll show you my idea. I give you… the Ballinteer Recliner!

I’ve sold recliner sofas to Dundrum, Leopardstown and Carrickmines and by gum, it put them on the map! Well, sir, there’s nothing on earth like a genuine, bona fide reclinified, three-seater sofa.

What’s it called?

Recliner sofa
What’s it called?
Recliner sofa
That’s right!

Recliner sofa
Recliner sofa
Recliner sofa
Recliner sofa

I’m tired in my legs and back
– Then pull the lever and ease right back!
You rhymed the same word twice just there
– I’m sorry, but I do not care.

What about that green single-seater?
– It’s free if you want it, you exhaustion-cheater!
Is there a chance that you’d deliver?
– It’s collection only, so no, not a sliver.

How will I fit it through my door?
– It’s detachable, and ‘cos of this and more,
I swear it’s Ballinteer’s only choice
Throw up your hands and raise your voice

Recliner sofa!
What’s it called?
Recliner sofa!
Once again
Recliner sofa!

But the bedroom still needs renovation
Sorry, Mom; can’t ignore this sensation!

Recliner sofa!
Recliner sofa!
Recliner sofaaaaaa!

RECLINER SOFA!

Yikes.

Blueswannabe writes:

Genius ad in fairness!

CONTEXT

Genuine, Bona Fide Reclinified, Three-Seater Sofa (Done Deal)

18 thoughts on “Anything Good On Done Deal?

    1. Mourinho

      Aaaaaand 2,469 views 4 hours later.

      There’s a reason he’s getting the big bucks.

      ….. but will it sell at €325? We’ll never know.

  1. Brendan O'

    You’ll be an even bigger legend on Irish Twitter now. Up there with Gary Gannon, Young Adult writers, and self-described Irish feminists.

    1. ironcorona

      What does “self-described Irish feminists” mean?

      Should women not describe themselves as feminist?

    1. The Real Jane

      Secondhand pleather, too.

      I’d describe 325 as “ambitious”. Maybe the seller hopes that any prospective seller will be blinded by the wit of a Simpsons pastiche.

      Fingers crossed.

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