Actually-brave BBC correspondent Nick Ravenscroft spent the night in Manchester as police battled to keep control of the streets, talking to the old bill and the hoodies.

Hear how he deftly expresses outrage to the looters (“What are you DOING?”) to their faces without getting his head kicked in.

“I’ll keep doing this every day until I get caught,” one rioter told him. “When I get home nothing is going to happen to me.”

Listen here

Meanwhile, non-rioting Hackney teenagers say: ‘It was bound to happen.”

 

The ad copy should bring on nausea.

“Renowned for their flannel-clad philanthropy, lumberjacks often donate garments to dull axes in need of sharpening up. Make a chopper chipper with today’s deal.”

“These aerodynamic denizens of the clouds offer aspiring sky tourists the chance to gall gravity with their fleet of well-propelled packages and services.“

“Altitude-vaulting voucher holders can test the sky’s limits as they step into their six-seater flying machine, ascending to begin a wingless voyage of Dublin discovery.”

“Choosing from a veritable vista of captain-class starters, mains and deserts, three course diners can take their taste buds on a freshly-prepared flight path to satisfaction, watching planes glide in and out from the restaurant’s wraparound viewing point whilst the fork makes a safe landing in their smiling mouth.”

Helicopter Ride And Meal (CityDeals.ie)

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c2x4A-uy-_0&feature=player_embedded

The morning crew at LMFM – literally the biggest breakfast show in the Louth/Meath area – tackle the bard with a mouthful of marshmallows.

You can see why this would be just wasted on radio alone.

 

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