Sir Charles Colthurst?

Blarney?

St Patrick’s Day?

It almost literally writes itself.

The natives of Blarney were almost in revolt yesterday after being forced to reroute their long-planned St Patrick’s Day Parade.

Organisers have been enraged by the last-minute withdrawal of permission by Sir Charles Colthurst [above feeding his dogs Scotch], who owns the green, to use it as the parade’s finishing point.