‘Tiny, Flaccid, Haphazard Erections’



But enough about our architecture.

Let’s talk mickey.

Miss Panti, judgmental Amy Schumer and Judd Apatow on stage.

Paddy, at Universal Ireland, writes:

As you may be aware Amy Schumer and Judd Apatow had an evening with Panti Bliss last Thursday on the eve of the Irish premiere of Trainwreck (2015). We put together a highlight reel of the best one-liners, quips and anecdotes for you to enjoy (above)…

Universal Ireland

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70 thoughts on “‘Tiny, Flaccid, Haphazard Erections’

  1. Jonotti

    Trainwreck is unbearable. Two hours of whiney improvised riffing with a feminist message laid on thick.

      1. Eliot Rosewater

        Care to tell us what the feminist message was, Jonotti? I too thought it was unbearable, but the whole plot is centred around a woman changing her behaviour in order to get her man.

        1. Anne

          Just a guess.. but I’d say he never saw the film and he’s a misogynist.
          They’d do be all whingey about the feminists, them misogynists.

    1. Parochial Central

      “hours of whiney improvised riffing with a feminist message laid on thick.” – but enough about that Panti buffoon. Still letting people smoke outside Jay Bourke’s bar?

    1. Always Wright

      It’s horrible. I get inexplicably embarrassed when I have to listen to it. It’s not just Panti though, Rory O’Neill has it too. Panti would be so much funnier if she spoke in an Irish accent and Rory’s worthy sentiments would be taken more seriously if he wasn’t pretending to be American all the time.

      1. Kieran NYC

        I think it’s just a general mishmash of Mayo, Dublin and time spent in Japan where I presume she picked up the twang.

      2. sǝɯǝɯ ʇɐ pɐq

        It’s not just Panti though, Rory O’Neill has it too.

        I snotted into my tea.

  2. John

    Schumer is not funny. I had the displeasure of having to sit through one of her shows a while back. Unfunny juvenile American “humour”.

        1. Mani

          I possess a sense of humour.

          Not that I wouldn’t trade it all for three international caps, my own business and a PhD, mind you.

          1. Mani

            I’m sure I could take any one of your comments and paint you in an unflattering light.

            Wait, of course I could.

        1. Dόn Pídgéόní

          That’s the female comedian equivalent of a rock band yelling out the name of the town they are playing it – makes you feel wanted.

    1. Seriously

      Her whole Sarah Silverman schtick is weak. She hasn’t the charm to pull it off.

      In a world where comedy has gotten more highbrow thanks to the likes of Louis C.K. it’s disappointing to see Schumer’s low-brow comedy hailed as the new feminism… Emperor’s new dick-joke

          1. ABM's Bloodied Underwear

            My experience of Louis CK is from a radio show where he called Val Kilmer’s wife a c*nt and hoped his kids got some kind of blood disease. The other is him repeatedly riffing on the word “vagina”.

            He comes across as an arsehole.

          2. sǝɯǝɯ ʇɐ pɐq

            If you don’t love Louis, look at this;

            You WILL love Louis.
            And maybe get a glimpse of his ‘layers’.

            (That 11yr old video above is not the current Louis CK, okay?. He’s better than that now.)

          3. Jones

            F*cking kids is ‘layered’? He’s neither layered, nor highbrow, no thoughtful. He is simply a comedian who is controversial and is currently ‘cool’ to like. Like a less offensive Frankie Boyle when he was a bit more relevant.

      1. Mani

        Two different styles of comedy. And you need to rewatch Louis CK’s stand up and not confuse it with his TV show.

    2. Inopro

      Do you know why Schumer is funny, though? Its generally accepted she is funny, and now that she is a more famous generally accepted funny person, the misogyny and tired ‘Schumer isnt funny cos women arent funny’ rants arrives. If she was less famous would many now saying shes unfunny not adore her? I think its a hipster thing, hate the mainstreamed.

      1. sǝɯǝɯ ʇɐ pɐq

        Ahem, ‘the mainstreamed’…

        Typo of The Year, or deliberate?
        Put me out of my misery.

      1. Clampers Outside!

        Mani is funny.

        At least that what my Ma says when he leaves Clamper Villas in the mornings. She said, “Shame I don’t get what I wanted *winks*, but I always get a good laugh when Mani’s here.”

        1. Mikeyfex

          Loius CK
          Bill Burr
          Kumail Nanjiani
          TJ Miller
          Patrice O’Neal
          Tom Segura
          Maria Bamford
          Jim Jeffries
          Todd Barry

          …Since we’re talking

          I’ve not seen much of Amy Schumer, first half hour of her stand up special, wasn’t blown away but it was after a lot of hype. She seems very quick in interviews though.

          1. Kieran NYC

            Thought Bill Burr’s stuff was great, but as you go further back into his older specials, he just seems a liiiiittle too obsessed with making domestic violence jokes.

            He’s really refined his material these days though.

          2. Mikeyfex

            Agreed Keiran. He podcasts twice a week now too and they’re mostly entertaining. Hadn’t heard of Sam Kinison. This is good. Who else?

          3. rory

            I’m noticing a lack of Irish people.
            Dylan Moran was pretty good, even when his ‘tortured irish drinker’ schtick smelt of paddywhackery to me. The strength of his material/delivery covered over that scent quite well.

            That opinion is about 7/8 years old though. Haven’t seen any of his new stuff.

  3. Clampers Outside!

    Tiny, flaccid, haphazard erections…. so basically she doesn’t know how to work it properly, yeah? Slapping it only works for those that like that sorta thing, otherwise you’ll startle the owner.

    That was Tip 522.6

  4. Custo

    All Apatow films are about half an hour too long, and often rubbish but I’ll always be grateful to him for Freaks & Geeks.

  5. Lennie

    How can you not mention the late great George Carlin one of the funniest guys to ever hit the stage.

  6. sǝɯǝɯ ʇɐ pɐq

    Joe Wilkinson is very funny.

    He paid me £5 to say this.
    Well, he said he was going to give me £5.

    Are you there?
    Can you see this Joe?
    -That’s £5, or €22 in real money.

  7. sǝɯǝɯ ʇɐ pɐq

    Forgive me for being pedantic, but dead comedians aren’t funny.
    They’re dead.
    Every single one of them.

    1. Spaghetti Hoop

      I disagree. It’s not funny that they died, but if they were the type of comedian that pondered on life’s ironies and were bemused by the world around them (e.g. Bill Hicks) then it’s kinda funny that a whole new audience find them funny, despite them being dead. Amirite?

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