Stockholm Sing Drome

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Nicky-Byrne-Eurovision-2016-mainglobearena

From top: Nicky Byne, Irish entrant with ‘Sunlight’; Globe Arena

The first Eurovision 2016 semi finals begins tonight from the Globe Arena, Stockholm, Sweden.

But what songs are worth backing?

And is Ireland’s entry among them?

FluffyBiscuits, ‘sheet Eurvision analyst, writes:

Every bookie and fan appears to think that Russia will be the leader of the pack this year.

Russia has entered 33 year-old singer Sergei Lazarev with his Greek Russian penned hit “You are the only one”.

The song is a club style hit with a larger than life performance. Lazarev has a slick production behind him with the Russians desperately wanting to win (distracts from the anti gay laws in part).

Following closely on his heels (!) is the Ukranian singer Jamala with ‘1944’ . 1944 tells the story of the deportation of the Crimean Tatars from the then USSR. and subsequent ethnic cleansing. It’s an emotionally charged R&B ballad with an ethnic edge that seeks to tell the story (and in the process annoy the Russians).

Third favourites are France, the song of which is an annoyingly catchy ear worm titled ‘J’ai cherche’ .

France sent young singer Amir who has the looks and the song that could take down mother Russia and restore French glory which has been missing from the contest for years.

Other favourites this year are Malta (think of drum n” bass mixed with pop – my personal favourite), Armenia (some young one screeching with ethnic instruments), Bulgaria (slice of upbeat pop), Czech Republic (strong ballad about domestic violence co-written by Irishman Aidan O Connor) and Australia with one of their stars Dami Im singing “Sound of Silence”.

Most fascinatingly of all, the one song (if you can call it that) that is really getting chins-wagging is Serhat from San Marino with ‘I didn’t know’.

Serhat is a Turkish TV presenter who is 60+. Originally the song was a dreary ballad that was destined to finish last until San Marino TV for the pure craic  lashed a disco track over it and painted him as a crooner. What ensues is three minutes of a song that is cheesier than an unwashed nun’s inner thigh.

San Marino are about 70/1 to win but the public do have a say this year in how the winner is decided alongside the juries.

As for the other bits around Eurovision – it is all drama.

– We have had the flag list incident where the competition organisers (the EBU) released a list of flags to be banned (it backfired spectacularly, listing the Kosovo flag alongside the ISIS flag was not a bright idea).

– Germany’s original choice of singer was withdrawn after homophobia allegations.

– Bosnia’s group got into a fight amongs themselves.

– The Israeli contestant Hovi Star (think pound shop Boy George) accused Russian immigration of homophobia and subsequently had a bitch off with the Dutch contingent.

– Romania kicked out for not paying participation fees.

As mentioned earlier Ireland are sending Nicky Byrne with the song ‘Sunlight’. A pop rock entry that tries so hard to be likeable but falls between the cracks as being too generic. It’s catchy and the lyrics nice and lovey dovey but that is all.

Let’s be honest here with ourselves, Nicky in my book was never really a singer, he is a showman who puts on a good performance and sings a nice song but its instantly forgettable and his voice is at best average (and he does have an album coming out soon and is married to Bertie Aherns daughter but that is just coincidence) . RTÉ missed the boat with this year’s Eurovision,

No point whinging anymore. I still love it, always will!

Betting tips – back Ukraine each way, Cyprus to qualify from the semi and maybe Germany finishing last. Above all enjoy it for what it is – a kitsch campy entertainment show with a dash of seriously good song writing in between.

FIGHT!

Pics: Eurovision

40 thoughts on “Stockholm Sing Drome

  1. mildred st. meadowlark

    “RTE missed the boat with this year’s Eurovision”

    Ha! They’ve been missing the boat for a few years now fluffster.

    Good article though, gave me some giggles.

      1. mildred st. meadowlark

        Much and all as I dislike Jedward they were the best act we’ve sent in years. They created a real buzz and the song was catchy and on trend, for Eurovision. Nicky Byrne is as exciting as drying paint.

  2. Bubbles

    “appearing to desperately wanton of winning the contest”
    Who is editing this stuff?

  3. zackersetu

    Germany last??? No…

    ‘Ghost’ is actually a good song! Plus Russia annoys me … yes it’s a good song ..yes it’s big performance, but halfway through the chorus I find myself singing the chorus from the winner of 2005 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8LvfpP52Kk …. yes its a completely different song … but a true Eurovision buff this is reminiscent of the – Fly on the wings of love / We’ve got the world tonight’ debacle!!

    If you haven’t guessed … i love the Eurovision .. and the fact that it has become awful .. somehow makes it better!

    1. fluffybiscuits

      Its a good song but what Im looking at is from the terms of the fan communities and betting odds. The song has hardly had a mention on the fan sites (Israel is being talked about lots for some reason and its a rubbish song). Im not saying its a bad song (its on my playlist) but the wider community is to blame.,

  4. Eoin

    I’m sticking 500euro on Ukraine to win. The whole show has descended into a camp political joke, instead of a camp musical joke. It’ll be 12 points across the board for poor Ukraine. The whole show will be a propaganda exercise, with constant reminders of what a beast Russia is.

  5. They Tried To Make Me Go To Rehab

    It was ok until the dreadfully catty stuff about Nicky Byrne’s in-laws

    Is there not even a sub-editor in the house at all at all?

    1. They Tried To Make Me Go To Rehab

      Yes until you started throwing dirt at Nicky because of his marital vows. Are you 8 years old or something?

        1. Dόn 'The Unstoppable Force' Pídgéόní

          Play your cards right and BS might send you as their correspondent next year using all that money they make from LJG kickbacks :)

  6. dav

    no mention of the eurovision sellout and the halftime show is now provided by justin timberlakes new song??

  7. Frilly Keane

    Who are ya dressing up as Fluffy?
    Tina?

    I’m doing a Red Hurley rig out for meself
    ( Annuder one that should’ve done better btw)

      1. Frilly Keane

        too easy and samey Fluff
        You can do better

        Dana is a good one
        of if you’re trying to impress someone
        Cliff….
        That ruffley Austin Powers look gives us all a sexy swagger on this night of all nights

  8. H

    I normally get bored with long posts half way down but that was witty and informative, I even had a look at Serhat and felt like I’d stepped back into the 70’s!

    Good work Fluffy!

  9. Brendan O'

    There’s a Norwegian singing a song called Icebreaker, how cool is that. Wiki: Agnete Kristin Johnsen, sometimes known as simply Agnete or (((Aggie))), is a Norwegian singer and songwriter. Johnsen is best known for being the lead singer of the Norwegian teen punk band The BlackSheeps.

    Aggie Icebreaker is a fake Twitter account. And some of The BlackSheeps songs – No Milk Today, Goin’ Insane, Nightmare, Punk Revolution, Cancellation and this: https://youtu.be/pDb9t_8-R4k

    1. JonesBaron

      Not to mention that Agnete’s struggling with bipolar disorder and has missed all press opportunities and has gone from rehearsal to hotel and no inbetween all week, I wonder is the high-pressure contest the right place for her?

  10. Mulder

    Nicky don`t do it, please as we will all regret, if per chance that ditty should win, then we will be listening to the yoke being played every hour on the hour of every week of every month for the entire year.
    On the plus side may get to tour again, thus parts of south Kerry and vatican and Albania, will be very ehh excited.
    Will he be dancing as well.

  11. Mulder

    Most important, as know this has been a problem for nicky going back to west life days, will he be playing his own instrument.
    Do not mean blowing his ehh own trumpet.
    As rumour has it he be a dab hand on the ehh fiddle.

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