Read on.

We all know the perfect hangover cure. It doesn’t involve anything intravenous, costs £5 and is easily accessible: The Full English Breakfast. Or perhaps more accurately, the All Day Breakfast (affectionately abbreviated to ADB) because any breakfast that isn’t served after 11am is hardly better than useless. What if one only crawled into bed at 9am?

However it appears on the menu, the breakfast has to abide by certain edicts. It must be hearty. It must have a revitalising slow rise of steam – like thermal springs in Nordic countries – but not be so hot as to be mouth-burning. It must be some combination of eggs, beans, hash browns (non-negotiable), toast, and for the non-vegetarians, sausages, bacon. Not black pudding, which should be illegal (I have a petition; I’ll send you the link).

In fairness.


’Tis the season of hangovers – and I’ve found the perfect cure (Hannah Jane Parkinson, The Guardian)

Pic: Alamy

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25 thoughts on “Soakage

  1. Slightly Bemused

    While I do agree about the black pudding (which, I believe, is the hallmark of a full Irish breakfast), what I have never understood is the beans. I mean, seriously? Beans for breakfast? Only on toast for a quick lunch, if you ask me.

  2. Bud Flanagan

    Hash browns because its the Guardian.
    In reality it should be bubble and squeak.
    And ALWAYS with beans.

  3. Spaghetti Hoop

    Trusted Tip: Always boil extra spuds for the previous day’s dinner so you have leftover spuddage to fry up for the breakfast, topped with a fried egg. No need for fancy hash browns or potato farls. Or stupid waffles.

    1. Paulus

      Indeed; the real thing…so you know where you stand; (though standing might not feature much in the equation)

    2. Slightly Bemused

      I agree. And if you do mash for dinner, the extras make excellent potato cakes the next morning :)

  4. paul

    I can live with hash browns, you have enough breakfasts in Belfast and it becomes a part of it. But pudding MUST be included, especially mushed onto buttery brown bread.

    Beans can take a hike, keep them in their own tiny bowl so their creeping sauces don’t touch the rest of the deliciousness.

    1. missred

      I cannot abide baked beans in any shape or form, they make me feel sick. Overdone mushy beans and sugary tomato sauce – bleugh….

  5. Termagant

    As a teen I found the best hangover cure was a pre-packaged egg mayonnaise sandwich from a petrol station

  6. Nilbert

    Dear Sirs,
    Why oh why oh why oh why must some unoriginal variant on this perennial article be published with such unwavering regularity.
    And why oh why oh why must it always be accompanied by the same hackneyed attempts at faux outrage regarding beans, condiments, egginess etc in the comment section?
    I assume we’ll be following it up shortly with breaking news regarding an immersion heater being left on?

    yours in fatigue,

    Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells

    1. Janet, I ate my avatar

      ah it’s a bit like having a matter about the weather,
      a pleasant break from our crap water system, health care, abusive Catholic church and homeless citizens

  7. V

    Do you know’
    Looking at that now – I’m quite surprised I’ve never done up a Morning After Hair of the Dog Sog for ye meself

    or maybe I did and forgot about it

    it wouldn’t have had beans anyway

  8. postmanpat

    Bacon in an “Irish ” (identical to “English” breakfast and “American” breakfast) breakfast?. It was never a real thing. You bunch of idiots!! But go ahead, eat pork products first thing in the morning… its “traditional” ™ since Madison Avenue focus groups made it up in the sixties and your still eating it up figurately and literally. Ireland High intensity skynet controlled pig slaughter houses are thriving in Ireland today (unlike the pigs) and the directors are getting rich using cheap foreign labour from brazil , aided by the blueshirts in power who only care about helping to create as many billionaire individuals to show off on the world stage and make it seem like we are all doing well , which we certainly are not. . It doesn’t matter about animal welfare, the local job market , (not that Irish labourers would be paid or treated well if they did hire them) or the general publics health . If people want to help themselves survive in a country that doesn’t care about them they can start with what they put into their bodies. Its a choice. Stop with the bacon and sausage first thing in the morning, try not getting hungover in the first place, your heart will thank you for it , the hospitals wont be as crowed with fatty bum bum heart attack and stroke patents that could have been avoided, not to mention colon cancer. Short your bodies out people. The Irish breakfast isn’t real. Shame on broadsheet for promoting it. Talk about backward.

  9. Iwerzon

    The late great Ciaran Carson has a whole chapter dedicated to the fry in his book ‘Last Night’s Fun’. Cigarette mandatory seemingly.

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