Tea towel on sale at London bookstore Housmans
In every good kitchen you’ll see
A towel to clean up spilt tea
No one will object
If the towel is checked
Just don’t slag off the poor DUP
John Moynes
Pic via Housmans
Author Archives: John Moynes
An artist’s impression of interstellar asteroid`Oumuamua’
There’s something big coming this way
So astronomers, starting today
Are launching a race
To find out if Space
Has anything worthwhile to say
John Moynes
Pic via The Guardian
Today in Japan there’s no news
As the big media companies choose
To give all their workers
The right to be shirkers
And curl up in bed and just snooze
John Moynes
Pic via Guardian
UK Prime Minister Theresa May and EU Commission President Jean Claude Juncker
Theresa and Jean-Claude both feel
That they’ve nailed down a workable deal
In which not much will change
Which feels rather strange
It’s almost like Brexit’s not real.
John Moynes
Pic: AFP/Getty
Earlier: The End Of The Beginning
Neapolitan pizza makers prepare pizzas in a bottega in Naples, Italy yesterday
If you like your pizza base thin
And airy then give it a spin
But don’t you dare start
To learn this great art
Outside Naples, for that’s now a sin.
John Moynes
Pic: Getty
Remain Calm
at
This is just a drill.
Via Defence Forces Ireland
The Defence Forces wishes to inform the public of a major exercise that will take place in the Dublin area today, Wednesday 6th December 2017.
The exercise will involve over 500 Defence Forces personnel, including the elite Army Ranger Wing, exercising with our colleagues in An Garda Síochána.
Members of the public can expect to see military vehicles, armoured vehicles, helicopters and armed personnel involved in the exercise.
We hope to keep any disruption to a minimum; however, this exercise is necessary to ensure that the Defence Forces are fully prepared when called upon.
Please follow Defence Forces Twitter @defenceforces for updates.
Fight!
Thérèse Dreaming by Balthus at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York
A work in the old New York Met
Is making some people upset
The spokesman Ken Weinne
Thinks the painting is fine
The petition though causes regret
John Moynes
A pharmacy boffin has said
That a drinker who’s going to bed
Should not pop a pill
To avoid feeling ill
As it won’t help to lighten their head
John Moynes
Pic: Getty
Sri Lanka’s captain Dinesh Chandimal wearing an anti-pollution mask during a cricket match yesterday against India in New Delhi
Some cricketers over in Delhi
Found the atmosphere terribly smelly
As a hazardous smog
Made them dash for the bog
And gave each chap a pain in the belly
John Moynes
Pic: AP
The plant in County Louth processed vodka from ‘denatured industrial alcohol’ (meths)
The guards found, as they sometimes will,
A rather large illegal still
And gallons of booze
That one should refuse
As methanol might make you ill.
John Moynes
Pic via Independent.ie