This morning we must bid adieu,
To the brilliant and glorious Sue,
And take time to extol,
The great Adrian Mole,
So well written, and funny, and true.

John Moynes

(Rex)

Is it too late to stop and ask why,
We’re bidding our culture goodbye?
It’s a beautiful game,
So it’s really a shame,
To sell off the bogball to Sky.

John Moynes

This weekend you’d best not be seen,
Wearing anything other than green,
Or else you might miss,
A chance of a kiss,
With an equally hammered colleen.

John Moynes

(Laura Hutton/Photocall ireland)

[UCD’s Morgan Kelly]

An economist told a sad tale,
Of a college inside of the pale,
Which was run by a clown,
Who dumbed everything down,
And wouldn’t let anyone fail.

John Moynes

(UCD)

The lads at the bookie’s have said,
That it’s funny when some woman’s dead,
The ASA insist,
On a slap on the wrist,
After thousands of punters saw red.

John Moynes

Were you watching the strange event which,
They are calling a technical glitch?
Primetime got caught,
Looping one single thought,
Causing twitter to grumble and bitch.

John Moynes

(RTE)

The makers of sugary snacks,
Know Michael Noonan has their backs,
He decided their wealth,
Matters more than your health,
So he wouldn’t drown them in tax.

John Moynes

(Sasko Lazarov/Photocall Ireland)

The boss of New York, good old Bill,
Has declared that he certainly will,
Not march on a day,
That leaves out the gay,
People from all the marching and drill.

John Moynes

(Fox)

Let us now take a moment to think,
Why the Scots are so fond of the drink
The ideas of A Neil,
Are bound to appeal,
To those who’re convinced Tories stink.

John Moynes

(BBC)