A nifty cuttlefiish bottle opener in polished grey steel, available from Bathsheba Sculpture – yours for an ink-disgorging €62.50 .
Crack open a Cephalöwenbräu.
Ah forget it.
The Cap Zappa (£6.99)
Opens bottles, then shoots a spinning bottle cap up to 5 metres.
As bottle openers go, this free-standing chrome-plated brass thing is fairly bulky but, once in position, an effortless pull or push in any direction pops the cap.
The manufacturer calls it the Top Gear, presumably imagining that its operation mirrors the shifting into fifth of a gear stick.
It also imagines you’ll pay ¥12,600 (€118) for one of the 100 limited edition pieces.
A gorgeous example of over-engineered steampunk: inspired by the eccentric drawings of W. Heath Robinson and made from 250 found objects by mechanical sculptor Rob Higgs.
The corkscrew was built over the course of three years and originally launched back in 2009, when a limited production of 100 units went on sale.
The Opena iPhone4 Case: developed via Kickstarter. Released in August. Preordered by anyone prepared to spend $40 on the world’s most ludicrous bottle opener.
Stainless steel. “Pleasantly heavy”. €13