Heartbroken And Punished

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Taking the trip to Liverpool today are a couple dealing with grief, and the extra trauma of having to fly to the UK for treatment, following the diagnosis of a fatal foetal abnormality.

The couple, who also have a disabled child, are documenting their trip on Twitter and Snapchat.

Writes the couple’s husband:

This Thursday, the 10th of November, we will travel to the UK from Ireland to have a termination. This is not by choice. Three months ago, after many attempts, we were overjoyed at the discovery we were successful.

Our first child was born with a genetic condition that meant we spent many months in hospital and will continue to do so for the foreseeable future. Although there is a risk any future children may carry the same condition we decided it was a risk worth taking.

At our first pre-natal appointment, we were offered a genetic screening test. Although it does not screen for the condition that affects our first child, it will for others that may inhibit the baby’s chance of survival. Of course we agreed to a simple blood test, after all the heartbeat now visible was strong and all markers pointed to a healthy pregnancy. Then we got the call that nothing can prepare you for.

A fatal foetal abnormality was discovered. We had never heard of Edwards’ syndrome before but we were told that even if carried to full term the period of life would be counted in the minutes and hours after birth. It is a crushing sentence for any person to hear, let alone for my wife who has had to give up her career to become a full-time carer for our little boy.

We went back for more tests and got confirmation. We should be telling our friends and relatives about our joyous news at just over 12 weeks; instead we are now past the point of being able to go to a hospital in the UK so we had to make arrangements to visit a clinic.

Traumatic in its own right, we also have to get someone to mind our child who requires constant monitoring throughout the day or his condition can cause him to slip into a coma and his brain can basically shut down. A lot of responsibility for us, even more putting it on someone else’s shoulders.

(Despite) what should be a simple procedure that could be carried out 20 minutes from home, in a risk-free environment, we are being forced to travel to the UK, leaving our child behind and the risks that involves to do the most humane thing possible to a baby that will never survive. That’s why we are going to document our experience from start to finish on Thursday.

We hope that this may enlighten those who do not want to listen or even allow the people of this country to decide for themselves. Our Government has continually kicked the can down the road and we, the people, must decide if we can allow this to happen. We hope that by documenting our experience it may help those that may have been through something similar or may be unfortunate enough to do so in the future.

Please share and check back on Thursday morning for updates throughout the day.

Twitter – @itstimetorepeal
Snapchat – itstimetorepeal

Heartbroken & Punished

41 thoughts on “Heartbroken And Punished

      1. Dόn Pídgéόní

        In supporting trump I don’t feel they really give two hoots about abortion or women. It’s click bait, pure and simple. Like ashes in the mouth.

        1. Yep

          One contributor, on one subject that none of us had any input in other than opinion.

          I would hazard a guess “they” have brought more eyes to subjects you and I would prefer to be common knowledge.

          Move on. Let it go…

          1. Dόn Pídgéόní

            No, its hypocritical and undermines everything they do. Women’s rights are a play thing, something to be right on about but not actually care about when it comes down to it. Women are expendable, POC are expendable, Muslims are expendable. Screw that.

          2. Dόn Pídgéόní

            I support her as someone who isn’t that piece of crap and all it means. But it’s done now and I’m scared for my family there. Very scared. It’s not a game and I’m not getting into silliness now.

  1. Daisy Chainsaw

    Stop punishing women and families. We shouldn’t be forced abroad for healthcare. Repeal the 8th and end the hypocrisy.

      1. newsjustin

        As some pro choice people like to say: “Don’t like abortion, don’t have one.”

        This person wants to have an abortion. It’s her choice. She explains why her and her husband made that choice – right after she says “this is not by choice.”

        1. ReproBertie

          Travelling to the UK for the abortion is not by choice though. That’s forced on them by the 8th, further proving that retaining the 8th does not prevent abortion.

          1. newsjustin

            If you choose to have an abortion in the UK then you’ll certainly have to travel to the UK alright.

          2. ReproBertie

            If you choose to have an abortion you’ll be forced to travel until Ireland does the sensible thing and repeals the 8th.

          3. ReproBertie

            No, we’re agreed they chose to have an abortion. Just like many thousands of others do.

            Travelling to the UK was not a choice. It was forced on them by the 8th amendment just as it is forced on the thousands of others who make that choice, often in similarly terrible circumstance.

    1. mildred st. meadowlark

      By necessity. As they have already stated, they have a child already with a disability, who requires full-time care, imagine the mother having to carry that child to term, knowing it will not live, and then having to deal with the emotional fallout that will inevitably come after. What effect will that have on her child? Are we to expect her to put on a brave face and just mindlessly get on with it? And her husband? He’ll just go and pick up the pieces?

      There is a lot more at stake here than just an abortion. More to consider than just the foetus.

      1. newsjustin

        There’s certainly far more to consider than just the foetus, as you say. That’s why it’s a very difficult choice.

    2. Daisy Chainsaw

      What’s the alternative? Give birth in a few months to a dead baby? Why keep a woman as a life support machine for over half her pregnancy? Why put her and her family through that kind of torture? The foetus will have no awareness of what’s happeneing today, no awareness of life, death, pain, or even the love of its parents. Leaving the foetus to getstate to birth will cause it physical pain and suffering and its family a huge amount of mental anguish.

      Please tell me what’s “prolife” about that?

      1. newsjustin

        The alternative choice is not having an abortion. That’s the point. It’s not that “this is not by choice.”

        1. scottser

          you should at least concede that this family faced a pretty grim ‘choice’, made even more difficult by the fact that they were forced to travel.
          I wouldn’t wish their circumstances on anyone, but I wonder how you and those who think like you would ‘choose’ if you were in their position?

  2. Neilo

    It isn’t the scrape your knee kind of healthcare, of course, but this question needs to be dealt with by referendum as quickly as possible.

    1. DubLoony

      Because the issues facing women need to be decided by them, their medical team and only the people they decide to bring into the discussion.

      Opinions of randomers on the internet aren’t needed.

      1. ReproBertie

        Well there’s a fada over the E on the coins. (I’m going on the assumption that Norman’s heart is broken by the lack of it in the sign above.)

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