Poet Kevin Higgins

Against Correctness

(A topical satire on the popular notion that, in the good old days, no one got offended by anything)

In the old days, if a woman casually
suggested of a morning on BBC Radio Four
that the old Queen Mum – Gawd
bless her and all who sailed in her – be taken
to a location on the Scottish Highlands,
and made lie back in a bath of sulphuric acid,
no one was in the least bit offended.

Back then, flaming transsexuals
in rocket fuelled hot pants
could flamenco dance
what they claimed were the bones
of Sir Edward Carson up and down
the Newtownards Road,
and receive only
wild applause.

Pranking students could happily
interrupt the Angelus on
Raidió Teilifís Éireann
to tell the nation
the Pope should be dragged
to the top of Carrantuohill
so the crows could peck
the flies from his balls, and even
the Bishop of Raphoe
would allow himself
to get the joke.

These days, if anyone so much as dares
bring in a law forcing mosques
to replace the call to prayer
with the music of Kate Bush,
or failing that, Ted Nugent,
the politically correct crowd
start making their fuss.

You can’t make a harmless
passing remark:
what a nice gesture it was
for the EU Commission to give
every homeless shelter in Greece
one of those Syrian boat children,
all chubby cheeked and oven ready,
so their drowning wouldn’t be
in vain; without someone
somewhere making a big
thing of it on the internet.
And a man can’t safely admit
in mixed company
that his favourite hobby, of a night,
is following random women
around dark car parks
to see how they react,
without some feminist calling him
sexist or worse. It has come to that.

Kevin Higgins

Yesterday: There’s Nothing For You Here

30 thoughts on “PC Gone Mad

  1. Slightly Bemused

    Ouch! That is biting! And well warranted.

    I would tip my hat to you, sir Kevin, but alas I lack one. Please accept my salute nonetheless!

  2. V'ness

    Seriously lads
    the mind that produces
    And a man can’t safely admit
    in mixed company
    that his favourite hobby, of a night,
    is following random women
    around dark car parks
    to see how they react,
    without some feminist calling him
    sexist or worse.
    It has come to that.

    and thinks its ok to wave it off under a rant about Political Correctness gone mad
    doesn’t get to call it poetry and claim artistic licence

    sorry folks
    Stalking was never acceptable
    Creeping around car parks just to get off on the reaction of an innocent unsuspecting woman was never an acceptable hobby
    Getting away with it – either then or now, has nothing to do with a more astute Politically Correct society we now live in; being Woke didn’t change that
    and to think that a stalker’s friends might consider it sexist was the worst that could happen, or that a feminist might take issue

    Jesus Christ t’night

    True Colours lads

    1. Holden

      I think that’s what he is saying Vanessa too. Stalking is bad. But he’s being all arty and poetic like.

      Political correctness as a term might be new but the process of people saying publicly, that is a bad thing has always been around.

      No?

    2. Slightly Bemused

      Sorry, V, I missed that. Got caught up in the lyric, I guess.

      Probably symptomatic of the problem

      But you are right. Apologies are not enough.

    3. MaryLou's ArmaLite

      100%

      This has nothing to do with feminism. Some people get their kicks from preying on others, especially women, and they need a good kicking.

    4. jamesjoist

      I think you’re not aware the poem is taking issue with people who caustically condem political correctness.

      1. V'ness

        That was the point up to the last verse

        Be called out as being a stalker, or a dark car park predator, is not a consequence of Political Correctness

        No matter what generation the creeper practiced his hobby
        His friends should have put it right
        Not some born again feminist politically correct woken

        That final paragraph betrayed the poet

        1. Tarfton Clax

          I know I am probably going to regret this … but.. Are you being serious or being doubly ironic by pretending you don’t see he is calling out the kind of person who claims it is political correctness gone mad that has prevented men from admitting this?
          “And a man can’t safely admit
          in mixed company
          that his favourite hobby, of a night,
          is following random women
          around dark car parks
          to see how they react,
          without some feminist calling him
          sexist or worse. It has come to that.”

          I genuinely can’t tell any more.

      2. NobleLocks

        I wouldn’t casually condemn political correctness. I am proud of my stance that Political Correctness is the language of Cowardice. It was a term coined by the Nazi’s when they refused journalists visas in the late 1930’s because they wanted journalists who’s views were more “politically correct” and it has gone on to poison every single thing it touches since. From the fun “ooo err missus, you can’t that to the denial of reality (ala men are womxn’s and if you don’t agree with me you’re a bigot) it warps reality in favour of the petty wants of the deluded.

        Lastly it’s a core tenet of the Neo-Right who used to be “The Left” until they sailed too far around their thought bubble only to come out the other side. Anything that is against that lot is good for the world.

  3. Tony

    I got as far as ‘flaming transsexuals’. I know Kev’s doing banter but in this poem it was kind of a sour note

    1. V'ness

      Its more than sour
      Its a windy bemoan about no longer having the benefit of the blind eye alibi a person with a taste for following women around dark car parks would have enjoyed before PC and the Woke Generation broke

      This is also the blind eye alibi that the Catholic Church enjoyed the cover of, Industrial Schools, Mother and Baby Homes, Laundries, adoptions, missing records
      Paedophiles
      Unsolved Murders – unsolved because they are not allowed be solved
      Women forced to leave jobs because of having children outside of a church marriage

      that sorta stuff

      But shur
      Why should I be surprised

      G’luck to ye lads

      Ye’ve finally done it
      and t’was a poet

          1. V'ness

            As a matter of taste
            Of course I do, it’s a cheap shot
            Like a pitch for a Carry – On Film

            It sets no unique artistic note or tune
            Its a gag in the style of Jim Davidson
            Which was the poet’s point
            But the poet writes to please himself, and his fan base

            And I don’t intend to impose my tastes

            However the poet introduced the imagery of stalking unsuspecting women
            And of it being acceptable, a hobby no less, until it because a casualty of woke feminists and political correctness
            That is not entitled to artistic exemption
            Because it is personal behaviour that should never have been permitted or enabled or lauded any anyone
            And most certainly should NEVER be permitted to be portrayed as a hobby
            It is deviant behaviour
            Then and now

            Transexuals can be who they like
            Dress what ever way they like
            As long as it’s not
            following random women
            around dark car parks
            to see how they react,

          2. italia'90

            What is going on here today ffs?

            Did everyone buy a new effin flame thrower or something?

            Did we trade in our satire reader for it?

          3. V'ness

            Jesus t’ night Tailia’

            And a man can’t safely admit
            in mixed company
            that his favourite hobby, of a night,
            is following random women
            around dark car parks
            to see how they react,
            without some feminist calling him
            sexist or worse. It has come to that.

            is not satire

            It’s sneering at people who object to
            …. following random women
            around dark car parks
            to see how they react,

            And to address it as a f’in hobby

            Woke my bottikins
            And ye are all giving it permission as satire
            Ara’ he’s a poet, artistic licence gaw’ love him

            True colours lads

            So the next time some hot head “artist” kicks off around here with more excuses
            Like blaming The Establishment
            Or Wimin n’ pesky Gender Quotas for the state of their own careers

            Remember it was ye that created the fertile ground for them

          4. italia'90

            It is satire,
            it may not be Johnathon Swift level satire,
            but it is satire none the less V.

  4. Ringsend Incinerator

    Very little danger this stuff will make it to the Leaving Cert curriculum, Kev.

    Or anywhere else.

  5. GiggidyGoo

    It ain’t poetry. It’s the random
    use of carriage return in sentences
    to try give the notion
    of
    poetry but I hope we don’t
    pay for grants
    for
    it

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