Tonelagee Mountain, county Wicklow last Saturday


…Via Robin Monotti Graziadei:

Them: You won’t be able to attend a concert or football games

Me: I don’t mind

Them: You can’t go to a large shopping mall

Me: I’ll survive

Them: You can’t drink at the pub

Me: I no longer drink

: You can’t enter night clubs

Me: I don’t go out at night

Them: We’ll tell your employer

Me: I don’t have one

Them: We’ll take it from your salary

Me: I don’t have a salary

Them: You can’t go to your job

Me: I don’t have or want your job

Them: You can’t be in the city

Me: I prefer living out in nature

Them: You can’t go to McDonald’s or Burger King

Me: I haven’t in years anyway

Them: You can’t eat at restaurants

Me: I’ll order takeaway

Them: You can’t shop at large grocery stores

Me: I grow my own food and buy from local farmers

Them: You can’t be part of society

Me: I already checked out

Them: Your kids can’t come to school

Me: I’ll homeschool

Them: You’ll be on your own

Me: I’m surrounded by my family and tribe and all the people reaching the same conclusion all over the world

Them: You can’t choose for yourself

Me: I just did

Them: What can we tempt you with?

Me: Nothing


Detain him NOW.


Eamonn Farrell/RollingNews

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21 thoughts on “Outta Here

  1. U N M U T U A L

    What’s the collective term for Witchfinder..? Asking for a fiend…

    Is it just me, or can anyone else smell smoke? ..;-)

  2. Nigel

    None of this makes any sense. What’s up with the picture? What does it have to do with the dialogue? The dialogue has no logic or progression to it so I’ve no idea what it’s supposed to be saying. The links go nowhere. Why is Bodger screeching at the end?

    1. Daisy Chainsaw

      People are out in public, wandering around their counties, not being terrified of Qovid, or 5 gees, or adrenachrome.

      For some reason, that’s upsetting.

  3. Kdoc

    Is there supposed to be a connection with Tonelegee and the Them / Me debate? Nothing quite like a hike up Tonelegee and a refreshing dip in Lough Ouler, that makes perfect sense; the Them / Me dialogue, not so much.

    1. millie bobby brownie

      It’s a scorcher of an evening where I am, and I’d only love to be doing a bit of a hike and a dip right now.

      Guess I’ll have to settle for a glass of Piquepoul on the front step instead.

  4. K. Cavan

    Of course it doesn’t make any sense, Nigel, don’t worry your head about it, wear a mask, wear a mask in bed, wear two, wear one for every “variant” that RTE has discovered in it’s lab, get a 2nd dose of vaccine, get a 4th, yeah, skip the 3rd, watch the news, if they’ve found a new variant, just pop on an extra mask, wash your hands, keep an eye out in case any of your neighbours start acting normally, call the cops on them if they do, it’s for their own good, the Greater Good, put on another mask, go back to being a bugman, maybe go get an “I Love the Government” tattoo, wash your hands, bring your pets for a vaccine, what do you mean, they’ve not developed one for animals? Most importantly, practice social distancing, hell, invent a new “Extreme Social Distancing” sport by fecking off, as far as possible, from anyone else, then wash your hands, it’s ok, your brain’s already been done. Now, tell everyone who disagrees with RTE that they’re mad, yes mad. Look up hazmat suits online, that’s not bad, is it free delivery? Did you hear the one about the Civil Servant who was told they could work from home? They replied “work???”

      1. Kdoc

        Particularly when the country is gradually opening up. I suppose when we get out of the woods with the virus they’ll be back protesting about 5g and paedophile rings in pizza parlours.

        1. K. Cavan

          Ah, that’s lovely, you think at some stage we’ll be “out of the woods”, was that inspired by the pic? When do you reckon we’ll be exiting these woods? When we’ve flattened the curve? I reckon the reason why parts of the US are out of the woods is that there’s so many obese people that the curve didn’t stand a chance.

      2. K. Cavan

        You’re just not wearing enough masks. I overheard someone the other day saying they got a virus on the internet, maybe you should stop using it, just in case? Maybe put a mask on your phone? Can you get a vaccine for the internet? Variants. Variants! If you don’t breathe, you won’t need a mask, if you’ve no hands, yes, you get it, chop, chop. Send for the Government, man.

          1. K. Cavan

            No, Daisy, it’s a teacher you’ll be wanting if it’s screens you’re after, the nurses are up to their eyes in Tiktok dance routines, what with the hospital bed occupancy rate the lowest it’s been in decades, because of the pandemic, like. Obviously, if you think about it, like, it would be crazy to keep hospitals open in a pandemic, they’d just be Vectors for Variants. Go for 4k, UHD, OLED, you’ll be able to see the bullpoopy in exquisite detail. Say something about “Freedumb”, it makes you look real smart. No, really.

          2. Daisy Chainsaw

            It’s 4/20 day. Spark up a doob and stop humiliating yourself with your bizarre word salad.

            Or maybe you have sparked up and you’re trippin…

          1. K. Cavan

            Of course it is, Nigel, everything is a virus, if you want it. Would it be DNA or RNA, single, double-stranded or broken, Positive Sense or Negative Sense? Let me know when you’ve decided but wash your hands before you even touch that keypad. Hint: Go for SS, RNA, negative sense.

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