Aryna Sabalenka was accused of grunting too loud during the Australian Open
In tennis they put up a front
By emitting a rather loud grunt
Can science explain
What they’re hoping to gain
With this curious audio stunt?
John Moynes
Pic: Getty
Author Archives: John Moynes
The media gathered to hear
How Trump’s health is doing this year
It seems he doesn’t keep
Fit or get enough sleep
But his genes give us cause for good cheer.
John Moynes
Pic: New York Times
Meanwhile…
Summary of Donald Trump's medical checks released by his doctor… #trumpmedical pic.twitter.com/9sxQi6NWa9
— Hopeless Surfer (@HopelessSurfer) January 17, 2018
Ah here.
In case you’ve been wondering why
I’m not doing January dry
It can cause you to shake
And spend all night awake
Which is something I can’t abide by.
John Moynes
Toon: Richard Jolley
The Sri Lankan President has reinstated the prohibition of selling liquor to females
In Sri Lanka there are those who think
That women should not purchase drink
If you weaken one clause
In their temperance laws
They’ll kick up one hell of a stink.
John Moynes
Pi via Sri Lanka Guardian
The Swiss have declared you must not
Drop a live lobster into a pot
Without stunning its brain
As they fear it feels pain
And the water can get rather hot
John Moynes
Pic: Shutterstock
Steve Bannon, Donald Trump’s Former White House Chief Strategist
Steve Bannon, a walrus-skinned hack
Has stabbed his old boss in the back
His outspoken views
Have upset Breitbart News
So the snowflakes gave Bannon the sack
John Moynes
Pic: AFP
British Secretary of State for Exiting the European Union David Davis (left) and European Commission member in charge of Brexit negotiations with Britain, Michel Barnier.
Davis can’t quite decide how to go
But he’s stubborn and cautious and so
If we make a plan
Then he’s just the right man
To ball up his fists and yell “No!”
John Moynes
Pic: AFP
A big story’s breaking this morn
That Westminster’s chock full of porn
For statistics say
That day after day
MPs go to work on the horn
John Moynes
Pic: Getty
Will cyclists soon see the day
Where they manage to keep cars at bay?
Such a law passed in France
But there’s quite a good chance
Ross will claim that he can’t find a way.
John Moynes
Rollingnews