I’m sorry, my dear, but it’s true,
George Clooney has uttered “I do”,
If that frightful old mare,
Hadn’t managed to snare,
Him I’m certain he’d have chosen you.
John Moynes
(AP)
Author Archives: John Moynes
FG Seanad nominee John McNulty with Enda Kenny
When you’re giving a fellow a start,
In the Seanad it’s not very smart,
If you let your stroke,
Just go up in smoke,
‘Cause the lad doesn’t care about art.
John Moynes
Pic: Donegal Daily
The guards have arrested some bloke,
Whose boat was found loaded with coke,
He said he did not,
Put the drugs on his yacht,
That it must be a practical joke.
John Moynes
Pic: Defence Forces
When phoning the queen of the land,
There’s something one must understand,
If she wants to purr,
Well that’s up to her,
But letting folk know isn’t grand.
John Moynes
(AP)
In Stradbally the culchies are now,
Meeting up just to watch someone plough,
They stand there all day,
Drinking gallons of tay,
And enjoy it, but I can’t see how.
John Moynes
(Laura Hutton/Photocall ireland)
Fear won in Scotland and so,
They’re sticking with the status quo,
The poor SNP,
Set nobody free,
For the people stood up and said No.
John Moynes
(Time)
John Bruton’s a tiresome old tit,
Who doesn’t know when he should quit,
The hard headed fool
Is still flogging Home Rule,
He should give it a rest for a bit.
John Moynes
(Laura Hutton/Photocall Ireland)
Tomorrow Scotland faces a choice. A serious choice. A choice the choosing of which will have implications for years to come. A choice about the future, about the very existence of these islands. Broadsheet has long been proud of its independence on questions of caledonian constitutionality. But as the clouds of war gather above Berwick-upon-Tweed we feel the time has come to make a stand.
The history of the relationship between Scotland and England is long and irrelevant. Tomorrow’s referendum is not about the past. It is about Thursday, and all the Thursdays to come.
We urge our Scottish readers to vote Yes, and when you win your place among the nations of the world we will raise a scotch and proudly utter the ancient blessing “iechyd da.”
……
The unfinished former Anglo headquarters in Dublin on Tuesday
Any day now the great and the good,
Will be called in to see if they could,
In some way pass the buck,
And make themselves look,
Like prophets, just misunderstood.
John Moynes
(Sam Boal/Photocall Ireland)
The audience shouted and cheered,
As on stage the contestants appeared,
Each daring to bare,
Their fine facial hair,
As they tried to win Britain’s best beard.
John Moynes
Pic: Western Gazette