UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson has warned his cabinet that a no-deal Brexit is a strong possibility
Johnson has started to feel
That he can’t guarantee a good deal
So he’s starting to talk
About taking a walk
And the car crash is now looking real
London News Pictures
UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson arrives last night in Brussels, Belgium for a ‘dinner summit’ with EU Commission President Ursula von der Leyen
They served Boris dish after dish
Each featuring a different fish
To remind him that they
Are still in the way
Of realising his greatest wish
Getty
The US Supreme Court has rejected Donald Trump’s bid to reverse Pennsylvania’s certification of Joe Biden’s victory in the electoral battleground
Having failed to come first in the race
Trump then took a very weak case
All the way to the top
But the judges said “Stop”
And the whole thing fell flat on its face
Getty
Dublin City Council has banned buskers from performing on the streets this December
As the council erects Christmas lights
The buskers are read their last rites
Covid’s still raging and
This means singing is banned
So we’re all in for long silent nights.
Meanwhile…
The Corpo have banned busking in Dublin city centre so the big all-star annual fundraiser for @Dublin_Simon on Grafton St is looking very unlikely this year – fortunately #YHRF are having an online hootenanny! €10 tix to help the homeless this Saturday💚 #Dublin pic.twitter.com/UmHv4OsefH
— Cáit O'Riordan (@rockyoriordan) December 8, 2020
An Indian politician has promised if elected to make a one-hour siesta any time between 1pm and 4pm mandatory
Let’s all give a very loud clap
For Vijay, a clear-thinking chap
Who’s running in Goa
And wants to bestow a
Right to an afternoon nap
Getty
Sinn Féin TD Brian Stanley (above) deleted his Twitter account last night following controversy over two separate tweets
The tweetings of Brian Stanley
A Shinner from Laois/Offaly
Have caused some dismay
But they’ve all gone away
So don’t worry, there’s nothing to see
Twitter/RollingNews
Homophobe Hungarian MEP József Szájer (above), of the right-wing Fidesz party, participated in a “gay orgy” in Brussels prompting accusations of hypocrisy
Because József failed to get away
From the raid on the romp on Friday
Fidesz took the line
That he had to resign
But they still won’t admit that he’s gay
Getty
A Chinese probe sent to the moon to bring back lunar samples has successfully landed, according to Beijing’s space agency.
This may come as a bit of a shock
But the Chinese have been taking stock
And it looks like quite soon
They will go to the moon
To make sure they don’t run out of rock
Jin Liwang/Xinhua
The Late Late Show host Ryan Tubridy has denied using the ‘F-word’ during last Friday’s Toy Show
If your fizzy drink gives you a scare
While working with kids be aware
Of the one golden rule:
Make sure you keep your cool
And as well as that don’t fucking swear
RTÉ
Taoiseach Micheál Martin addressing the nation on exiting from Level 5 last Friday
The medical boffins agreed
That the numbers were not what they need
To let us run free
Now the government see
That before long they might have to lead
