This morning the guards put a dent,
In the profits of gangsters who meant,
To sell fake aftershave,
So their punters could save,
But the peelers are now on the scent.
John Moynes
(Irish Times)
Tag Archives: John Moynes
We’ve finally dropped the pretense,
That journalists should make some sense,
And at long last Lu,
Has met someone who,
Can stand beside her and sound dense.
John Moynes
(RollingNews.ie)
The beautiful Andrea Corr,
Has let her fans know what’s in store,
Her talent, it seems,
Will melt through steel beams,
As Jim brings the band back once more.
John Moynes
(Rexfeatures/Wire)
Irish Farmers’ Association president Eddie Downey (left) at a protest against falling farm incomes last August
Ed Downey, who works on a farm,
Is possessed of great wisdom and charm,
At the end of the day,
He deserves all his pay,
And a pension, and more. What’s the harm?
John Moynes
(Leah Farrell/RollingNews.ie)
The general election next year,
Will lead to considerable cheer,
For the bounders and cads,
Who write and print ads,
There’ll be no austerity here.
John Moynes
(RollingNews.ie)
We finally have a day when,
Us fellows are free to be men,
For the rest of the year,
We cower in fear,
Of a peck from a vicious old hen.
John Moynes
Model Simon Wolfson ‘helixes’ his beanie hat
If this morning you’re planning to slap,
On a knitted and rolled woolen cap,
Before going to town,
Please don’t pull it down,
Or you’ll suffer a fashion mishap.
John Moynes
(Guardian)
George Hook and Pamela Anderson at RTÉ studios on Saturday night
That charming broadcaster George Hook,
On Saturday night was in luck,
A beauty he knows,
Just blossoms and grows,
While he’s looking crumpled and shook.
John Moynes
Pic: @georgehook
Lucinda Creighton, leader of Renua
Would you like a nice slap up meal,
With ReNua’s charming big wheel?
You would? Well right now,
Let’s talk price, tell me how,
Does a hundred and twenty quid feel?
John Moynes
(RollingNews.ie)