Australian boffins using using ‘citizen science observations’ estimate there are about 50 billion individual birds in the world
Some scientists put out the word
They wanted to count every bird
And it adds up to fifty
Billion, that’s nifty
But it strikes me as rather absurd
The 99 ice cream is at risk due to a Cadbury’s Flake drought
At long last you can finally take
A very well earned seaside break
You may even dream
Of eating ice cream
But hard luck: there’s a shortage of Flake
Minister for Tourism Catherine Martin is to recommend the removal of restrictions on UK visitors which will allow residents of the Republic to travel freely to Britain
Of late there has not been a way
To travel on a holiday
But you could have mighty
Craic over in Blighty
Before long, so the government say
Australian woman An Gie Yen (above) now “sounds very Irish” after having her tonsils removed
Have you heard the tale of An Gie Yen?
She had tonsil surgery and then
Her accent went rogue
She developed a brogue
Though I hope she recovers again
Pic: Twitter
The Enviornment Protection Agency wants monitoring of water quality at busy beaches outside the traditional swimming season
These days people swim in the sea
All year round, so experts agree
You can’t only test
When the weather’s the best
To keep bathers as safe as can be
Irish Water protest at the GPO, O’Connell Street, Dublin in August, 2015
They say, in the OECD
That the people of Ireland should be
Paying for water
So maybe they oughta
Read up on our history
At least one leopard remains on the loose in the Chinese city of Hangzhou after three escaped from a local zoo
Three leopards last week, for a lark
Escaped from a safari park
But then the park’s bosses
Hushed up these losses
And kept everyone in the dark
Pic: Twitter
A New Zealand man daubed very large penises to alert authorities to potholes
In Auckland there is a new fad
Of drawing, round potholes, your lad
Those responsible swear
It’s a call for repair
But authorities say it’s just bad
Authorities in Romania have launched an investigation amid accusations Arthur (above), the largest bear in the country, was killed by a European prince
Romania’s a country where
A royal can go on the tear
And have lots of fun
By taking a gun
And shooting a rather large bear
AP
Musician Jim Corr’s complaint over an article that described him as a an ‘online quack’ has not been upheld by the Press ombudsman
Jim Corr thought, for the crack
He’d complain when he was called a quack
But the ombudsman found
The description was sound
Which must feel like a stab in the back
