On a rasher you often will find
A thick strip of crisp tasty rind
But soon we’ll all feast
On a slim GM beast
And leave that rare pleasure behind.

John Moynes

Shutterstock

New Zealand’s National Party ad that breached Eminem’s copyright

If your party is going to choose
A rousing campaign song to use
Then check for yourself
It’s not straight from the shelf
Or you’ll end up in court and you’ll lose.

John Moynes

Enda Kenny leaves Government Buildings on his last day as Taoiseach on  June 13

Now Enda has has polished his brand
You can hire him to speak to you and
Enjoy his great wit
The only thing’s it
Will set you back twenty two grand.

John Moynes

Rollingnews

Luke ‘Ming’ Flanagan MEP

Poor Ming had to stand up and say
That he somehow cast his vote astray
When he marked his card
For a border that’s hard
Which was not he wanted. No way.

John Moynes

Rollingnews

A huge cave found on moon could house astronauts, scientists claim

If you think we should live on the moon
Here’s some news that you’ll find opportune
They’ve discovered a cave
Which immediately gave
Rise to hopes that we could go back soon.

John Moynes

Pic: NASA/GSFC/Arizona State University

Proposed drink-drive legislation will increase rural isolation, say critics

Some blueshirts will not like the news
That the forthcoming vote about booze
Will have a tight whip
From which they can’t slip
And run free to vote how they choose.

John Moynes

Rollingnews

George Saunders and his Man Booker prize winning novel ‘Lincoln In the Bardo’

George Saunders woke up to realise
He’d picked up the Man Booker Prize
On his very first go
Which just goes to show
Aim high and you might touch the skies.

John Moynes

Pic: AFP

Some boffins have sought to explain
How dolphins and whales can maintain
A tight knit family
Deep under the sea
The answer’s a very large brain

John Moynes

Pic: Getty

Met Éireann forecast position of Storm Ophelia at midday today.

Please stock up on foods that are tinned
And hope that Met Éireann rescind
The weather alert
Before people are hurt
It’s time that we all break this wind.

John Moynes

Map: Met Éireann

US President Donald Trump

So Trump will announce a new plan
To try to look hard on Iran
But he won’t quite repeal
Obama’s old deal
As he isn’t enough of a man.

John Moynes

Pic: AFP/Getty