US President Donald Trump has signed an executive order challenging the liability protections of social media companies
Trump wants to change the design
Of places where folk chat online
So Facebook must choose
To support his fake news
Or else face a crippling fine
John Moynes
Reuters
Yesterday: You Follow?
Elon Musk’s SpaceX rocket launch was called off last night because of the “strength of electric fields in the atmosphere,” according to NASA
The big moment was drawing near
For Elon’s long hard shiny spear
But some coward cried “Stop!”
And the launch was a flop
You can try again later my dear
John Moynes
Getty
….Twitter is completely stifling FREE SPEECH, and I, as President, will not allow it to happen!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) May 26, 2020
Now Donald has never been shy
Of making things up on the fly
So he doesn’t think
There should be a link
Suggesting his words are a lie
John Moynes
Getty
Met Éireann has issued an alert to farmers warning of weather conditions ‘conducive to the spread of potato blight’
It seems that the weather soon might
Be cause for good cheer and delight
But sadly it could
Be bad for the spud
As the boffins are warning of blight
John Moynes
Pic: Shutterstock
UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s aide Dominic Cummings, who is accused of flouting lockdown rules, at Downing Street yesterday
Now Dominic likes to explain
That he has a superior brain
And Johnson agrees
Which means that he sees
To not back him would just be insane
John Moynes
Getty
Director of the French intelligence service says he needs geeks, not just ‘supermen’ like James Bond, played by Daniel Craig (above)
The French have decided to try
To hire a new type of spy
They’ve put out the word
That they’re seeking a nerd
Who can write C++ on the fly
John Moynes
Pic: Universal Pictures
A variety of animal breeds can now be booked to join Zoom meetings
David Brent-types are wondering how
They can make all their colleagues laugh now
If you’re in that boat
You can now hire a goat
For a Zoom call. It’s certain to wow
John Moynes
Retired British Army Captain Tom Moore, who raised £33m for the NHS, is to receive a knighthood.
When your actions are causing outrage
And you want a distracting front page
You can never go wrong
By giving a gong
To a hero who’s reached a great age
John Moynes
PA
US President Trump announced yesterday that he is taking the drug hydroxychloroquine as protection against the novel coronavirus
Ignoring his own FDA
Something moved Donald to say
He’s taking a pill
That could possibly kill
So there may be good news on the way
John Moynes
Getty
Update:
This afternoon.
A letter just released but dated yesterday from Dr Sean Conley, physician to US President Donald Trump, defending the use of hydroxychloroquine.
K-League club FC Seoul has apologised after using sex dolls to fill up its empty stands
A stadium that’s empty can feel
A bit flat, in fact rather unreal
And so FC Seoul
Thought that they’d fill the whole
Place with sex dolls, does that seem ideal?
John Moynes
Getty
