“An Irish Sea border is now a certainty,” said Ulster Unionist Party leader Steve Aiken (left) yesterday
Things look bad for the poor DUP
As there’ll now be a border at sea
But really they’re grand
As the one on the land
Looks set to continue to be
John Moynes
Telegraph
The grenade was found in the Grand Canal close to Harold’s Cross Bridge, Dublin 6
There were Troubles a century ago
And Dubliners might want to know
There’s still bombs to be found
In odd places around
The city, and up they could blow
John Moynes
Controversy-rocked singer Bryan Adams at Slane Castle in 2000
Bryan Adams has said he thinks that
The Chinese adore eating bat
There’s no need to hear more
From this washed up old bore
Just dismiss the sad old racist twat
John Moynes
US President Donald Trump walks out of a press briefing yesterday following an altercation with two reporters over COVID-19 testing.
A high profile job can be tough
There’ll be days when you have had enough
But when you’re the boss
You won’t give a toss
You can just run away in a huff
John Moynes
Getty
Skateboarder Gui Khury makes history with the first 1080-turn on a vertical ramp
One lad used his time off to learn
A trick that all skateboards yearn
To eventually nail
So it’s time we all hail
King Gui of the very long turn
John Moynes
The Warty Comb Jelly has caused chaos in European waters where it eats fish larvae and even its own young
There’s a hideous warty comb beast
That treats the whole sea as its feast
And if it’s short of food
It will eat its own brood
And not be upset in the least
John Moynes
Pic: University of Southern Denmark
Maximilien Robespierre’s The Cult of the Supreme Being was intended to be the state religion of the new French Republic
On this day Robespierre had a dream
Of of a cult of a Being supreme
A long winded and odd
Way to talk about God
Which quite swiftly fell from esteem
John Moynes
US President Donald Trump has said the White House coronavirus task force is to be wound down
When you’re finding your day job no fun
And there’s a campaign to be won
Just decide to ignore
A few thousand deaths more
And declare that your work has been done
John Moynes
AP
Pope emeritus Benedict XVI has accused opponents of wanting to silence him
A Pope took retirement and then
Found everyone ignored him when
He brought out a book
And this left him quite shook
So let’s all pay attention to Ben
John Moynes
AP
A Japanese aquarium has asked the public to video-chat with their ‘lonely’ garden eels
In Tokyo the garden eel
While in lockdown has started to feel
Frightened and blue
What they want you to do
Is FaceTime it. Can this news be real?
John Moynes
Pic: Sumida Aquarium
