Author Archives: John Moynes

Leo Varadkar in government buildings last week following his election as Fine Gael leader

At long last we get what we need
A Taoiseach who was born to lead
So rejoice in the sight
Of a step to the right
As our nation is swallowed by greed

John Moynes

Rollingnews

US President Donald Trump at his first cabinet meeting yesterday

A cabinet met to find ways
To shower a toddler with praise
It may seem bizarre
But that’s how things are
It’s like North Korea these days.

John Moynes

Pic: CNBC

Marine Biologist Kevin Flannery with a rare moray eel found off the coast of Kerry

When swimming it isn’t ideal
To bump into a wild moray eel
So stay far from Kerry
Or else you may very
Well end up as a fish’s meal.

John Moynes

Pic Sally MacMonagle

UK Prime Minister Theresa May (centre) after voting in yesterday’s General Election

An election’s a smart thing to call
If you think that you’ll stay standing tall
Now the last song is sung
And the parliament’s hung
And the Tories ran into a wall.

John Moynes

Pic: AP

Earlier: He Hung On

A female peacock goes on the rampage yesterday at a California liquor store

It can be a tedious bore
To toil in a small liquor store
But it gets lively when
An angry peahen
Throws all of the booze on the floor

John Moynes

‘Professor Poo’ workbook for Japanese primary school children.

One thing that each child knows is true
Is that learning’s a hard thing to do
But out in Japan
They’ve thought of a plan
To fill up the textbooks with poo.

John Moynes

US President Donald Trump announces America’s withdraw from Paris Climate Deal at The White House yesterday

Now Donald has boldly said he’ll
Pull out of the big Paris deal
He thinks the solution
Is much more pollution
As climate change cannot be real.

John Moynes

Pic: Getty

Our President thought of a scheme
To give everybody ice cream
So down by the pier
He drew a loud cheer
When he finally realised his dream.

John Moynes

We’re trying, but can’t find a way
To predict what the Donald will say
He grabs his phone and
With his tiny hand
Makes “covfefe” the word of the day.

John Moynes

Update:

FGHIT!