In Derry some reckon The Sun
Is a newspaper people should shun
So they’re writing to shops
Saying don’t sell red tops
It’s not censorship, just good clean fun.
John Moynes
Author Archives: John Moynes
British Home Secretary Amber Rudd at the Conservative Party Conference yesterday
The racist Home Secretary Rudd
Revived Enoch’s river of blood
With a plan for a list
That all should resist
As she drags Britain’s name through the mud.
John Moynes
Pic: Getty
In Punjab the cops want a word
With a menacing terrorist bird
That’s been spreading fear
All over Kashmir
Which strikes me as rather absurd.
John Moynes
File pic
Rory McIlroy (right) points out a heckler at yesterday’s British Open
I come here in sadness to say
Europe lost to the great USA
There was heartbreak and tears
And mean-spirited jeers
Which I will not repeat, oh no way.
John Moynes
Pic: Reuters
Galway restaurateur JP McMahon
A chap called JP who cooks food
Says restaurant staff can be quite rude
Then goes on to say
That up in Galway
They sometimes end up in the nude.
John Moynes
Pic: Goodfoodireland.ie
Finally.
Justice catches up with vicious ‘veg for fruit’ kingpin Aidan ‘Bad Apple’ Devlin.
The streets are a little safer today.
Crafty Belfast Tesco shopper took apples but paid for carrots (Belfast Telegraph)
Minister for Finance Michael Noonan and Minister for Public Expenditure Paschal Donohoe at government buildings earlier this month.
Our unfortunate ministers fear
That they won’t get to spread much good cheer
Just two euros a week
But they have the cheek
To call it a hundred a year.
John Moynes
Rollingnews
Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton ahead of last night’s US Presidential Debate
I stayed up late into the night
To see a magnificent sight
Each of the pair
Had incredible hair
And one spoke incredible shite.
John Moynes
Pic: Associated Press
‘Anti-Isis coalition’ including Ireland (top) and without (above)
It turns out the facts weren’t quite right
On a US Defence Force website
It said we were willing
To help with the killing
But Ireland is not in this fight.
John Moynes