I’ll tell you, in case you’ve not heard
Of a large antipodean bird
Whose descent with a crash
Made a big online splash
And went viral while looking absurd
Author Archives: John Moynes
A €12,000 course for female shepherds aims to restore balance in Spain’s countryside
Senoritas who may want to keep
And manage their own herd of sheep
Can take a course and
Cough up twelve grand
A price I think is a bit steep
Pic: New York Times
Mark Russo (above) has been charged with carving his twitter handle and the Qanon motto “WWG1WGA” (Where We Go One, We Go All) at ‘America’s Stonehenge’
A QAnon cultist called Mark
Who seems not to be a bright spark
Set out on his own
To carve into stone
His twitter account for a lark
Pic: Salem Police Department
The brain of a baby Zebrafish lights up when you play it MC Hammer’s U Can’t Touch This, according to a New Zealand scientist
A boffin has tried to explain
What happens in a fish’s brain
When it hears MC Hammer
She must be a scammer
As her actions don’t sound fully sane
Rex/Alamy
Singer Dolly Parton is inoculated with the Covid-19 jab that she helped to fund
Ms Parton said those who are not
Brave enough to take a shot
Of Covid vaccine
Should know that they’re seen
As walking piles of chicken squat
Downing Street is trying to set up a charity that could cover the costs of the refurbishment of Boris Johnson’s flat
The Prime Minister now reckons that
He would like some work done on his flat
But of course there’s no way
That Johnson will pay
Instead he’ll just pass round a hat
Getty
Donald Trump bashed the Biden administration at the US Conservative Political Action Conference yesterday
I’m sad to say Donald is back
And immediately on the attack
He vomits up lies
And doesn’t realise
That America gave him the sack
Getty
“You could be the perfect spy. All you need is a cause.” ― John le Carré, A Perfect Spy.
What’s your cause? See if it aligns with a rewarding career at #CSIS: https://t.co/vEGTS8Am2n pic.twitter.com/AtPSNQk6GM
— CSIS Canada (@csiscanada) February 25, 2021
A recruitment tweet by Canadian Intelligence included a quote from ‘A Perfect Spy’, about the life of Magnus Pym, who double-crosses his colleagues
The Canadians decided to try
To find themselves a perfect spy
But there’s clearly no way
They’ve read le Carré
Would they really want Pym to apply?
A UK NHS boss has warned stars like Gwyneth Paltrow (above) of their “duty of responsibility” when talking about Covid treatments
The blog of a Hollywood star
Touts Covid solutions that are
Unlikely to work
And thus certain to irk
Doctors, who call them bizarre
Taoiseach Micheál Martin addresses the nation at Government Buildings last night
Martin’s now saying that by late June
Which, let’s face it, is reasonably soon
We may have the vaccine
That remains to be seen
But if so I’ll be over the moon