A Fine Gael member canvassing for a Yes Vote in Friday’s Blasphemy Referendum at Tara Street train station, Dublin 1 last week.
I’ve never been much of a fan
Of Ireland’s old blasphemy ban
So let’s end the oppression
Of our free expression
And bin it as quick as we can
John Moynes
It seems that one drinker in three
Considers themselves to be free
From doctors’ advice
Which is rather precise:
Don’t knock back a crate of chablis
John Moynes
Pic: Getty
Raw sewage from the equivalent of 88,000 people flows into Irish waters every day
It’s rather distressing to me
That in thirty eight parts of our sea
That all you can do
When swimming through poo
Is avoid it by swimming through wee.
John Moynes
Presidential candidate Peter Casey has said he will remain in the campaign
Bould Peter won’t give up the fight
Not now, when the end is in sight
So he spoke of his hate
Of our whole welfare state
Which was ballsy, if not very bright
John Moynes
Sheep at the National Ploughing Championship last month in County Offaly
In the country one should always keep
One’s hands off the next person’s sheep
Or your reputation
Will face devastation
As penalties go that’s quite steep
John Moynes
A Californian teenager made cookies using her grandfather’s ashes
If you’re planning to bake a nice treat
Make a cookie that’s crunchy and sweet
But please do not mash
Crematorium ash
Into something for people to eat
John Moynes
Pic: Shutterstock
This morning’s Irish Times/MRBI poll ranking the major parties’ approval ratings
A new poll has come out which said
The blueshirts are eight points ahead
So will they persevere
On into next year
Or go to the people instead?
John Moynes
Graph: Irish Times
EU’s Brexit negotiator Michel Barnier (left) and UK’s Prime Minister Theresa May
It seems that the prospects are bleak
For the big EU meeting this week
As the Brits just aren’t able
To sit round a table
And agree what it is that they seek
John Moynes
Montage via Daily Express
Shane Ross at Stepaside Garda Station protesting against its closure in February, 2013
Stepaside’s new Garda station
Is the source of much local elation
But it seems that the bill
Is so hefty it will
Cause outrage elsewhere in our nation
John Moynes
Taoiseach Leo Varadkar (left) and Fianna Fáil leader Micheál Martin
They’ll hint, but won’t openly say
An election might be on its way
And while there’s a chance
It’s all part of the dance
They’re just rattling sabres today
John Moynes
