‘Wet pubs’ – pubs not serving food – could reopen their doors in early October
Some government ministers think
That it’s time to go back to the drink
Just wait a month, then
We can have scoops again
Unless do-gooders kick up a stink
John Moynes
Tag Archives: A Limerick A Day
Yes and No campaigns in New Zealand’s upcoming referendum on the legalisation and taxation of cannabis are split at 49.5% each
Of late it’s been widely agreed
That New Zealand’s a fine place indeed
But the voters are split
If you ask them is it
A smart move to legalise weed
John Moynes
Pic: Grizzle
A man in Brisbane, Australia found two massive snakes (above) in his home which had fallen through his kitchen ceiling
An Aussie who likes to partake
Of some tea got up one day to make
A nice calming brew
But the next thing he knew
He was staring at a massive snake
John Moynes
Pic: Brisbane North Snake Catchers and Relocation/Facebook
Musical events and gigs may be allowed to go ahead if alcohol is not served
It’s looking like maybe quite soon
You can go hear a band play a tune
But the staff will refuse
To let you drink booze
So it isn’t that much of a boon
John Moynes
Pic: Whelan’s
It will be an offence to attend a home gathering with more than six visitors
If you’re starting to think of a plan
To invite six friends round for a can
And invite more
The next knock on the door
Might just be from a police man
John Moynes
Pic: Kevin Scott
Phil Hogan (above) has resigned as Ireland’s European Commissioner
The former Commissioner Phil
Has announced that from now on he will
Not oversee trade
As there’s food to be made
On his brand new George Foreman Grill
John Moynes
Last night: He Could Be Anywhere
France’s interior minister has defended the “precious” right to sunbathe topless on beaches
A French scandal is brewing and it’s
About whether one should flaunt one’s bits
In Ireland a sinner
Attends a golf dinner
In France they just cover up tits
John Moynes
Getty
Taoiseach Micheál Martin wants the 2020 GAA All-Ireland championship to go ahead
Micheál would think it a shame
If Paddy can’t watch a big game
It’s a risk, but FG
Are bound to agree
If it goes wrong then he’ll take the blame
John Moynes
Phil Hogan is ignoring calls to resign over Golfgate as it emerged he was stopped by gardai on his way to the event for using a mobile phone while driving
The EU Commissioner Phil
Is fast running out of goodwill
He took us for fools
And broke all the rules
And travelled while people were ill
John Moynes
A golf dinner with eighty one
Politicians may not sound like fun
And it breaks lots of rules
So it looks like those fools
Caused a scandal that will run and run
John Moynes
Pic: Wikipedia