If you want to poison your boss
Or strangle them with dental floss
You may think that’s bad
Or that you’re going mad
But psychologists don’t give a toss
John Moynes
Pic: Allstock
Tag Archives: John Moynes
US President Donald Trump and Taoiseach Leo Varadkar at Shannon Airport yesterday evening
So Trump came to pay us a call
And display his great IQ shortfall
He thought he could sell
Brexit as going well
And he thinks that our border’s a wall
John Moynes
Washed up psycho @BetteMidler was forced to apologize for a statement she attributed to me that turned out to be totally fabricated by her in order to make “your great president” look really bad. She got caught, just like the Fake News Media gets caught. A sick scammer!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 5, 2019
US President Donald Trumpo responds to being misquoted by entertainer Bette Midler (top left)
Most presidents simply don’t get
A chance to get angry with Bette
Midler who tweeted
And later deleted
A quote which she may now regret
John Moynes
Pics: Getty
Boris Johnson launched his campaign yesterday to be leader of the UK Conservative Party
So Johnson’s advisers now feel
It’s time that he made his appeal
And if he can excite
The old Tory right
He’s the man to get Britain no deal
John Moynes
US Republican Senator Ted Cruz and Democrat congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez tweeted their agreement over a ban on lawmakers becoming lobbyists.
Did you think you would ever see
The day Ted Cruz and AOC
Would both come around
To find common ground
On a topic where they both agree?
John Moynes
Pics: Fox
US President Donald Trump reportedly ordered a warship named after John McCain to be ‘out of sight’ during his recent visit to Japan
Trump has always shown great disdain
For the late honest man John McCain
Just the sight of his name
Can make bone spurs inflame
And cause the dear leader great pain
John Moynes
Pic: US Navy
The five-foot long snake, named Sammi by wildlife rescuers, was found abandoned in the Wicklow Mountains National Park last weekend.
The annals of old Ireland say
St Patrick drove our snakes away
So long in the past
That his magic can’t last
And they’re slithering back here today
John Moynes
An albino panda spotted at a nature reserve in southwest China
This morning we see a rare sight
That will bring nature lovers delight
Now it’s not about race
But this panda’s face
Is surprisingly entirely white
John Moynes
AFP/Wolong National Nature Reserve.
Taoiseach Leo Varadkar, above with Fine Gael TD Maria Bailey, has said her claim against a Dublin hotel has caused “reputational harm” to Fine Gael.
If you’re planning to sit on a swing
You may want to remember one thing
Hold on with your hand
And all will be grand
Don’t fall off, continue to cling
John Moynes
Update:
Theresa May is expected to announce her departure date as UK Prime Minister today
Raise your hands and shout Hip Hip Hooray
For at long last this could be the day
When the UK can be
After these long years free
From the tyranny of Mrs May
John Moynes
Pic: Getty