It really enrages me when,
They award those who work with a pen,
Like Banville, O’Brien,
And young Donal Ryan,
But overlook limericks again.

John Moynes

Joseph O’Connor and Jennifer Johnston via Bord Gais Energy Awards

Roast a turkey and fill the punch  bowl,
Fly Old Glory from a totem pole,
It’s the day that the Yanks,
Gather round and give thanks,
To the people whose country they stole.

John Moynes

Pic via Polymic

Those liberals are up to their tricks,
They want their Church governed by chicks,
It’s absurd. Let’s get real,
All those at Christ’s last meal,
Were chosen because they had dicks.

John Moynes

Pic Reuters

With our country so damaged by greed,
It’s good to see Gardaí succeed,
At taking on crime,
For I must say that I’m,
So relieved to be saved from this weed.

John Moynes

Tom Crapper’s wonderful invention,
Is so common we don’t stop to mention,
That one third of our race,
Must seek out a dark place,
So today let’s pay them some attention.

John Moynes

We have two – yes, TWO – large glossy prints of the imaginary adventures of Tintin in Dublin and Cork by Grainne Tynan to give away.

Yes, it’s a Friday Tintin ‘Rick off.

When guilty of an online sin,
One must give the mob a chance to win,
By writing a ditty,
About old Cork City,
Two wonderful prints of Tintin.

John Moynes

All Cork/Dublin Tintimericks before 2pm.

Please express city preference.

You can purchase a print here

No cash, favours, posters, etc. were given for this post.

UPDATE: winners:

Dublin

There was a young lad called Tintin
Who loved an old Red Bull and gin
He smoked Jonny Blue
And Snowy did too
The scanger kingpin of Dublin

‘Ah Feck’

Cork

Tintin left The Pale just to see
If he’d find a new life by the Lee
But there weren’t any jobs
Folk talked like Eddie Hobbs
So he legged it back to Dublin 3

Aurora

That hideous Tory Nadine,
Was placed in a crate with umpteen,
Maggots, crickets and bugs,
And all manner of slugs.
This show’s so much fun it’s obscene.

John Moynes

(ITV)