Maura Healy Rae and her father Danny during the General Election 2016
I see that the new Healy-Rae,
Has something important to say,
She doesn’t aspire,
To live in The Shire,
And hide rural housing away.
John Moynes
Pic: Dan MacMonagle
Previously: Continuity Healy Rae
Professor Stephen Hawking
It’s a shabby and shameful disgrace,
That humans have not conquered space,
But the world’s favourite prof,
Has teamed up with a toff,
To launch the next phase of this race.
John Moynes
Getty
If you think that the world’s greatest song,
Is by Zeppelin, well maybe you’re wrong,
A judge will decide,
If Plant and Page lied,
When they said it’s their work all along.
John Moynes
Pic: Vinyl Tempest
A display of illegal dumping, Frankfort Cottages, Killarney Street, Dublin 1
The council have thrown a curve ball,
Putting litterbugs up on a wall,
Fifteen minutes of fame,
Brings attention and shame,
That the dirty ones don’t want at all.
John Moynes
Fianna Fáil’s Micheál Martin at Leinster House Yesterday
Fianna Fáil say that they feel,
They can’t accept Fine Gael’s deal,
They’ll seize the controls,
Or go back to the polls,
There’s a whole country still there to steal.
John Moynes
Rollingnews
New Yorker writer Calvin Trillin
In New York they say that the sight,
Of a poem should cause simple delight,
But try to play nice,
When writing of rice,
Or you’ll kick off a nasty food fight.
John Moynes
The New Yorker
Republican US Presidential candidate hopeful Ted Cruz (right) and family last night
The people in Wisconsin choose,
To give their support to Ted Cruz,
He may be a freak,
With a far right wing streak,
But it’s worth it to see Donald lose.
John Moynes
PA
It seems that our beaches are full,
Of faeces that comes from the gull,
I’m all in a flap,
About taking their crap,
And I reckon it’s time for a cull.
John Moynes
Irish Dr Mark Bonar accused of prescribing banned treatments to sports stars
The innocent youngster might hope,
That footballers don’t cheat with dope,
That the beautiful game,
Will remain free from shame,
Can we reassure them? Erm, nope.
John Moynes
Times
And the award for most tasteless #aprilfoolsday ‘gag’ goes to… https://t.co/VF8qWQ69vw pic.twitter.com/k0mYYODjQw
— HuffPost UK (@HuffPostUK) April 1, 2016
If you don’t want to look like a fool,
Then remember this one simple rule,
What the newspapers say,
Is nonsense today,
The rest of the year though, they’re cool.
John Moynes
