US President Donald Trump made the case for a southern border wall in a live television address last night
With his border wall still out of reach
The President made a big speech
Now here’s a surprise
It was chock full of lies
It really is time to impeach
John Moynes
Pic: AFP
Sligo farmer Andy ‘The Bull’ McSharry said he will kill any dogs found with or without a lead on his land.
A farmer is taking a stand
Against any dog found on his land
And though you may plead
That your pet’s on a lead
He’ll still open fire out of hand.
John Moynes
Russian model Oksana Voevodina (right) married Malaysia’s Muhammad V of Kelantan (left) in Moscow last week
A king who once sat on a throne
Said he could continue alone
Then a young Russian beauty
Turned his head from his duty
That’s a risk to which all men are prone
John Moynes
Pics: Getty
Belgium recorded 255 reports of UFOs in 2018, an increase on the 171 witnessed in 2017
One thing we all know is true
Is in Belgium there’s not much to do
So to Flemish surprise
When they looked to the skies
They saw something come out of the blue
John Moynes
Pic: Getty
China has made history by landing on the far side of the Moon
Now China, Earth’s biggest commune
Has reached the dark side of the moon
Though in the space race
They’ve missed out on first place
It’s still something one shouldn’t lampoon
John Moynes
Pic: EPA/EPA/China National Space Administration
Newly re-elected Republican Utah Senator Mitt Romney (right) says US President Donald Trump has caused ‘dismay’ worldwide
Incoming Senator Mitt
Has decided that finally it
Is safe to attack
The president’s back
But will he score a palpable hit?
John Moynes
Pic: Getty
The Garda division of Cavan/ Monaghan recorded a detection rate of 19.11 per 1,000 of the population for both drugs and alcohol
In Cavan it seems people think
It’s okay to drive when you drink
But this strange disorder
That thrives near the border
Can’t be met with a nod and a wink
John Moynes
Pic: Northern Sound
It’s Christmas, let’s start to prepare
Here‘s oil for your down below hair
The opening bid
Is forty four quid
You can stick it- well, I won’t say where
John Moynes
Pic: Goop
UK Prime Minister Theresa May and Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn in the House of Commons yesterday
As one all the Tories conclude
That Jeremy was rather rude
To their dear leader May
But what did he say?
Who cares while their country’s still screwed?
John Moynes
Pics: Sky News
Yesterday: Read My Lips
US President Donald Trump has agreed to dissolve his charitable foundation
The Donald once sought acclamation
By running his big Trump Foundation
Which he called a success
But the books were a mess
Which defied any honest narration
John Moynes
Pic: AP
