Japan has resumed commercial whaling after three-decade hiatus

Now this is a rather sad tale:
In Kushiro they’re setting sail
Which means that quite soon
A massive harpoon
Will be killing an innocent whale

John Moynes

Pic: AFP

UK Tory Party leadership hopeful Boris Johnson apparently called the French “turds” during a fly-on-the-wall documentary about his time as Foreign Secretary.

I do find it rather absurd
That the BBC censored a word
To help a blonde freak
Take them all up the creek
With no paddle, just one massive turd

John Moynes

Pic: Rollingnews

Parts of a ‘full Irish breakfast’ costing €12.50 served on Irish Ferries’ Dublin Swift

If you think that you’d get to eat well
On a ferry I’ve bad news to tell
You will hesitate
To taste what’s on your plate
Once you have a quick look and a smell

John Moynes

Pic via Irish Times

UK Tory Party leadership candidate Boris Johnson has revealed he makes models of London double decker buses in his spare time

Now Johnson has caused a new fuss
When he took some time out to discuss
How with paint and a crate
He builds an ornate
Facsimile of a red bus

John Moynes

Pic: Getty

Paris, France is expected to be hotter than the Sahara Desert this week

If you’re on a Parisian street
This morning you’re in for a treat
As temperatures soar
Then rise a bit more
And all you can feel is the heat

John Moynes

Pic: BBC

A Japan zoo uses a man in furry suit during an ‘escaped lion drill’

Do you think you’d know what to do
If a lion escaped from a zoo?
The Japanese will
As they’ve just had a drill
Which was a strange process to view

John Moynes

A horn-like growth apparently caused by the habitual bent-neck posture of frequent mobile device user

It’s time for young people to scorn
Their smartphones as Oz boffins warn
That when used to excess
They cause ligament stress
That’s likely to give you the horn

John Moynes

Pic: Scientific Reports

North Korea’s Kim Jong-un (left) and China’s Xi Jinping met in Beijing last January

I know you’ve been waiting to see
A summit between Kim and Xi
And if we could each
Hear the wisdom they teach
Oh what a great world this could be

John Moynes

Pic: AFP

UK Tory party leadership candidates, from left: Boris Johnson, Jeremy Hunt, Michael Gove, Sajid Javid and Rory Stewart take part in a BBC television debate last night

Five candidates made their appeal
To try to get Tories to feel
That soon, if and when
They move to Number 10
They’re best placed to get a no deal

John Moynes

Pic: AFP

Pope Francis will ask bishops to consider ordaining married men as priests in South America

For centuries men have been told
If they’re wearing a ring made of gold
They can’t be a priest
Or rather, at least
Until they’re sufficiently old

John Moynes

Rollingnews