Slightly Bemused writes:

How do you know when your instant noodles are ready to eat?

This is not intended to be a trick question. For something seemingly simple, it actually is not. For example, are we talking about the type that come with their own handy cup, or the variety that needs to be boiled in a saucepan? And do you wait until the water there has boiled before you go for your two minutes, or start from scratch?

If you use the extra vegetable sachet, with its four peas, six kernels of corn (yep, I counted once. I was bored), and some bits that may once have dreamed of being carrots, wait until they are no longer crunchy, but have gone squishy. Your noodles might be ready then, and if you avoid the dubious orange bits, perhaps even palatable.

The stalwart of many a student diet over the years, instant noodles will, demonstrably, keep you alive.

My preference is the packet variety, especially when I remember to bring food bags. I do not always eat the whole pack, so I may want to save the rest (still dry) until tomorrow. If all you have to eat are the noodles, a whole pack may be what you need, but if you can snarf an egg, find some scallions, maybe some bamboo shoots from a tin in a weird and wonderful little shop, well, you just may have a delight of dinner!

Always bring some stock cubes, though. Usually better than the ‘flavour pack’

The biggest problem, though, can be the boiling water. Did you know that water at high altitude boils at a lower temperature? So if you are sitting atop the world in the Himalayas, your two minutes may take a bit longer to get your noodles ready.

In a number of places I have travelled, noodles were the lunch of simplicity. They won’t spoil, and you can carry them pretty much anywhere. But hot water was an occasional problem. The best solution I ever had was a very simple, down and dirty vacuum flask. With a big cork bung, it was better than the high tech ones my colleagues had. It also served to provide hot enough water at about mid afternoon for something close to a decent cup of tea. And lunch, in the oversized aluminium cup, did take a bit more than two minutes. But the veggies were not crunchy, and the view was occasionally spectacular!

In our vehicle, too, there was a way of wedging the flask behind the passenger seat against the back one. It did not move, and was there when we needed it. In the same car I also once figured out that you could lodge seven 500ml cans across the front dash, and in the summer, that meant if you turned the aircon on but set the blower to demist, by the time you got home you had cold beer.

And enjoy it over a bowl of instant noodles!

Slightly Bemused‘s column appears here every Wednesday.

Pic via Wikipedia